Flat plains drifter…Netherlands #30

Statistically the Dutch are the tallest people on earth.Modern day Nephilims,as a result their interior design caters for this.For instance the peep hole on my hotel door is positioned just above my head,the mirror in the bathroom just about lets me see my forehead and the urinal in the bar last night was so high it was akin to a pissing contest at school…as someone who is not amongst the statistically tallest in the world this can be a challenge let me tell you…

Ah well,last day in Zeist,last day in Netherlands and indeed last day in mainland Europe.Once again it’s been great and once again I’m also eager to get back to Blighty too…

To honour my Dutch hosts I’m sporting my vivid orange t-shirt( the last clean top in the bag!) was going to wear black shorts too but looked far too much retro full kit wanker.The kit once again being circa 1974 where I could imagine myself as Johan Cryuff but that would be blasphemy as all we had in common was our smoking habit.Probably more of a Johnny Rep with my mad hair…

Working out the times for tomorrow earlier.I have to get a bus to the railway station then a train to Amsterdam to hook up with Eurostar.My train back to London isn’t until 1-40pm.I deliberately booked a later than normal train to give myself plenty of wriggle room…went across the road to my local bus stop and there’s no ticket machine so had to go app hunting on my phone yet again…

It says on my North Netherlands transport app I can get bus tickets but there’s no evidence of it but they have a specific local bus app so I downloaded that and hopefully it’s gonna work tomorrow morning ok…had a count up of how many local transport apps from all over Europe I have and it’s approaching forty.I have no clue where half of them are for and most of them are probably out of date and I’d imagine the vast majority need some sort of update…oh and at least 75% I’ll probably never use again but I’m loath to clear them away…

Be interesting to see if the Dutch border control is any different to the others,I doubt it is.The old joke of “ do you have any drugs? No? Want some?” Won’t ring true these days and I’m not making that joke either…

Barman just saw my Wolf’s head on my phone and we had a good John de Wolf discussion…

So coming to the end of the trip and i say this every time but it bears repeating.Not one ounce of shit from anyone.Everyone I have met in all the different places have been top notch with me and I’ve been made welcome everywhere.Take no heed of what Farage & his clan of Trump lickspittle spineless goons say…Europe is fine and I just wish we as a people would admit we’ve been suckered by liars,cheats & opportunist Putin/Trump suckups into Brexit and demand a re- vote into the EU sooner rather than later…

Even the little things make a difference.In a supermarket earlier getting some salami & rolls hovering by the bread section and a young girl  comes over talking to me.Of course I asked if she spoke English,which has to be the most redundant question in this country “do you want rolls? “ “ yes,two” “ can you wait thirty seconds?”  I wasn’t sure what was happening but she came back with two piping hot rolls from the oven.No need to do it but it was a sweet gesture…the rolls bin was already rammed but she just wanted to help me out.Sweet eh? 

I was saying earlier about everyone has been cool to me the last month.Well the fella I was chatting to earlier about John de Wolf sent me a drink over on the house…popped into the other bar and had a nice convo with one of the women with a dog.Strange but feel a bit connected to this odd little town…

Sorry this blog’s a bit longer than most but trying to cram a wee bit in on what will probably be the final one this summer unless Wolves do something extraordinary and I have to write it down.We have got Man City first game so…

Good start to the morning.Waiting at the bus stop trying to buy a ticket on the app( only valid an hour) bus came but it was 5 minutes early so obviously gonna wait…nope.Next one 25 minutes.This is why I give myself time in these circumstances but also whilst writing this a woman could see I was’nt paying attention to the bus sitting at the stop( a different one) and tapped me on the shoulder to tell me that it’s ready to go.Again helping for no other reason but to help…I like the Dutch.

Ok peeps i think this blog’s long enough.Currently waiting for the Amsterdam train…see you all soon and as the Dutch say…Doie Doie.

Flat plains drifter…Netherlands #29

So then my Interrail has finished.My prescription drugs are one day from finishing ( I miscalculated by a day,sure it’s fine) and I’m two days from finishing then getting the Eurostar from Amsterdam to London…oh yea and the bus I normally get from St Pancras to home has also finished but that’s another story…

Back in the bar with the sassy barmaid, it’s ok but I found one last night which I prefer.It’s closer to the hotel on a different road and walking past last night with no thought of going in there were three people outside with dogs and they all rushed towards me barking ( the dogs,not the people) but no teeth bared or anything so I thought fuck it i‘ll sit here and within a minute was happily petting all the dogs and engaging in small talk ( with the people,not the dogs) found my last local of the trip…I was even asked if I’d visit again before i left which doesn’t usually happen…on the way there is also an ice cream shop that yesterday lured me  in by the downright underhanded dirty trick of the boss sitting outside and saying “ hello” to me.The devious bastard.Needless to say it worked and no doubt will work again later.They know a mug when they see one…

One of my new mates…

Meanwhile it’s pissing down so might as well stop here for a bit knocking this out…

Saw a crash today.I say crash but let’s call it a shunt.A DHL truck backed up into a car at about 2mph,there was plenty of shouting and waving from passers by but he didn’t stop his rampage…it wiped out the front bumper & reg plate.Funny when you see a car triple somersault at 100mph,fall down a cliff then drive off with barely a scratch in the movies you barely question it…I think they could be lying.

Zeist seems a very well to do prosperous town as did Bilthoven too.I don’t know if it’s standard for small Dutch towns or just a northern Netherlands thing.They do seem to have a definite look about them too.Very orderly and clean and like Bilthoven a fairly young population.It’s a nice little place.Most of us have visions of The Netherlands based on Amsterdam,including myself before this visit,but that’s only a small section of the country.Like many think of Britain being like the cliched tourist version of London…was also told it’s pronounced “ Zaist” which is not at all like the three or four versions i came up with…

Only found out today that Black Sabbath’s most iconic tune “Paranoid” was nothing more than an album filler knocked up in a couple of hours to fill up a few minutes at the end of the LP.Amazing how these things sometimes happen…”How can I be the Prince of Darkness with a Brummie accent?” Once again RIP Ozzy…

As a matter of interest ( well to football fans maybe) the Dutch football association( KNVB) is based in Zeist.So kudos to Zeist…you lot still should have won the 1974 World Cup…

On that note of total football which couldn’t quite go total enough goodnight…

Flat plains drifter…Netherlands #28

I always suffer from a little bit of angst when catching a train in Europe.Mostly of the “ am i on the right one?” Variety.Understandable I suppose and luckily as yet I think it’s only happened once in ten years that I’ve been on the wrong train.The other main concern is if they suddenly change platforms at the last moment which is a fairly regular occurrence.It happened today but luckily it was only one platform over so no worries but occasionally there’s a sudden scurry on the platform,everyone grabbing their bags and rushing off somewhere and that  pushes the angst meter right up high…

Invariably it involves another train to the one I’m getting as most of the platforms are doubles and people are waiting for a multitude of trains…however when it is my train( or I think it is) I have to ask a guard otherwise if I blindly follow the crowd I could end up chasing my tail all over the station not knowing what’s going on…it’s only fun when you eventually get on your bloody train…

I never get angsty over my ticket,especially Interrail,as it’s always cool,neither do i about getting a seat despite  rarely reserving one.I stood today for the first part as it was only 45 minutes and it was easier than looking a seat…ho hum.I think what I’m trying to say is if you’re doing this type of thing for the first time it’s perfectly normal to get a bit edgy when dealing with European train travel but 99% of the time it all works out well and when it doesn’t at least you have a story to tell…

Currently crossing the border into the Netherlands.How can i tell? My mobile phone company told me of course…I wouldn’t have a Scooby where i was if it wasn’t for them…

Arrived! Four train changes and a bus ride.It all went very smoothly I must say.Had some angst getting a bus though.They’re always the worst if you don’t know the rules.The train’s easy.You get on,find a seat and show your ticket when asked with the bus things change from place to place.Is it the right bus? Do I just get on or do I scan my ticket? Am i sitting in the seat normally taken by Mavis the matriarch of the 56? Luckily the young bus driver talked me through it and even dropped me off at the corner where the hotel is…had to buy a ticket from the machine though as the app didn’t cover it…

When I got to Utrecht I had a version of their Greggs sausage roll,just as good & flakey.The Dutch eat as much crap as we do,drink as much as us & probably smoke more so how do they stay fitter? Here‘s how…

Two bloody flights of these to my room! The Dutch are worse than the Germans for their stairs…oh and the bikes built like tanks of course…

Found a bar close by.There’s a fair few and I’m central too.Floundering whilst ordering a drink and the girl said “order in English” so yea I did then said something about i should learn some Dutch and she said “ yes you should,this isn’t Amsterdam!” All with a disarming smile but with a little hint of resentment…gotta love the Dutch.They know how to make you feel welcome whilst turning the knife in your guts…

Talking of a knife in your guts.RIP Ozzy…

Flat plains drifter…Germany #27

Last day in Bremen,damn,last day in Germany…no idea when I will be back but hopefully next year.Have stocked up on cheap baccy to take back to Blighty.Not a great deal,maybe five packs but it’s something for our taxman to think about.Take that taxman…

Crossing the border into the Netherlands again tomorrow.Train journey look‘s like it’s a bit of a bugger but that’s life.I am staying in a little town called Zeist which sounds like it must mean something but apparently not,at least not in any dramatic way.I think when I saw it I was thinking of “Zeitgeist “ and thought that sounded pretty dammed cool…it’s a small town by Utrecht again just like Bilthoven is.Looks like I’m doing a tour of small towns in the northern Netherlands and in a way I am, like a struggling singer songwriter trying to find one lucky break…

However I didn’t really research this place properly,whilst genning up on it yesterday,looking at the local map etc it suddenly dawned on me there’s not an actual railway station there! Ooppps…the town where the train stops is Driebergen-Zeist a short bus ride away.Luckily I kept the local transport app on my phone so should be ok getting the bus just as long as I get the right one…should be fun,or not…

Currently back in Litfass bar in Viertel.Gonna have an afternoon in here and give Die Fliege a miss.Think I might need to be fully awake for the journey tomorrow morning/afternoon.Looks like at least a five hour job…

Besides I only have the cash I have in my pocket to last me until I get to the Netherlands because once again I got confused with my “going abroad “ bit on my bank app and can’t use the card again in Germany even if I wanted to.Haha I have yet to get this bloody thing 100% correct but at least I visited the atm yesterday for some cash…

Germany is still a cash heavy society,especially in the sorts of bars I enjoy going to.If in doubt ask before ordering drinks.Saw a fella order a few bevvies in the Auberge Düsseldorf and try to pay by card despite there being signs all over the place about it being cash only.He might have been trying to pull a fast one but was politely pointed towards the atm next door and told to get the appropriate cash out and advised that other bars on the strip might not be so pleasant in their approach if he tried it on those.Think he got the message…

At least German WiFi is improving,and about time too,had hardly any problems with gaining access to the whole damn world of internet tomfoolery this time around…even the trains haven’t been too bad.Famous last words with one last trip tomorrow!

The bar I’m in are playing some Goldie Looking Chain and some of the locals are looking a bit confused.The ultimate in culture crossover…Welsh rap in Germany.Hahaha…

I will miss Bremen.It‘s a cool city.If you‘ve not been you should take a visit unless you’re any of the things above in which case Bremen’s not the city for you.Actually nowhere is the place for you…

Laters all…

Flat plains drifter…Germany #26

There are many good things about German stations but one probably overlooked is being able to stroll in,grab a takeaway coffee and go up to a platform for a quiet sup & smoke without getting a stream of people asking for a smoke or change outside.I feel like I’m in my own little heaven…yes I’m easily pleased.Mind you it’s not a foolproof plan as no sooner had I written that paragraph someone came up and asked for a smoke.Even up in these rarified heights life finds a way…

When I was here in Bremen about a month ago it was very hot & sunny and it would appear to be that way again.So if you want that sort of caper you know where to go…Bremen is a very green city, I don’t mean environmentally,although it’s generally lefty leaning politics suggests that would be the case anyway,but just in general.There a few parks of course and also most of the riverside is green but get just outside the centre and many of the streets are gloriously tree lined,most of them are fully matured too which also gives a lot of shade.With the large six stories housing it’s got the look of a middle class leafy London suburb but in a good way not a Abigail’s Party kinda way…

Just had a Currywurst with toast instead of Pommes and it was lovely & cheap ( €4-50) actually it was better than normal as I find they over salt the Pommes and usually there’s too many which tends to fill me up too easily.Plus,and I know this is sacrilege,they slaver far too much mayo & red sauce on.Having said all that it can still be a wonderful thing…and I still haven’t had my ice cream.Maybe later…

Got my ice cream! Only joking,it’s fine once it’s calmed down…

One thing I will have to do when I get home is renew my phone.It’s already about 18 months out of its contract and to be honest the phone is working fine & in good condition which is more than be said for the lead & connection which is beginning to play up & give me die Angst…

Got my ice cream.Mint of course with added brain freeze of course…

The seagulls are starting to make a racket which means one of two things: There’s a hawk nearby or someone’s just bought chips…

Found my way back into Die Fliege and at €2-50 a bottle of Becks why not? It’s pretty packed ( about 20 people) and the barmaid made me pay upfront.I tell you man the place has changed…I have even lost my regular chair and not one person shouted out “Norm!” when I walked in.Can’t see me staying here for more than three or four…

I only stayed for two in the end as the barmaid( 4th different one in two days) charged another price for the second Becks and I can’t be doing with arbitrary charges at my age…

On that consumer bombshell goodnight…

Flat plains drifter…Germany #25

Phew.Confusion solved.The board was “economic with the truth” by not showing Bremen as a stop until the train was actually coming in.They do this sometimes the little scamps…I have even found a free table despite it being packed as expected.I don’t know if this is because they’ve failed to put the reserve signs on the seats or I have just been lucky.Also the seats opposite with noisy kids have just vacated to elsewhere…yes the train’s late but all things considered I’m doing ok so far…

Does anyone else think it’s slightly weird that Germany has a city named Essen? It means “Eat”

Got to the hotel and the fella remembered me from a month ago.Asked about the trip etc so that was sweet of him.Must see hundreds of people weekly…anyway on the opposite side of the hotel this time and I have to be careful as I’m only three floors up facing The Hauptbahnhof & tram/bus station with huge windows.Last time I was facing a wall so was quite happy traipsing around buck naked however I don’t want to alarm the natives this time around…

Was hunting locally for an Eis shop cos’ I really fancied some ice cream but found myself going past Die Fliege and remembered it being nice & cool in there so beer it is out of the heat…the same old duffers are in here along with this old duffer…oh and Die Fliege is apparently the German name for The Flying Dutchman which also used to be a pub on the Warstones estate in Wolverhampton too if I remember correctly.I suppose we’re closer to the source here than a sink estate in The Black Country is…their musical taste is varied to say the least from Yes to Bananarama with a sea shanty in between…

That eternal question has raised its head again.Laundy or not laundry? It’s now the 19th and I’m back on Eurostar on the 25th.I think I can last,socks not a problem as I can always go bare.Under crackers also on as long as…well you know.T-shirts getting low again though but I think I can see it through if I double up however there might be someone saying “ god I was sitting by a right smelly bastard from Amsterdam” it’s a risk I’m prepared to take though.Sod the laundry!

Took a stroll around my floor in the hotel earlier ( ie got lost) I had no concept how many rooms it has.There must be 60/70 rooms on my floor and there’s six floors.Bloody hell.The rooms are ok too.A fair size with a bathroom…

We are now on to spandex bouffant haired 80’s power rock stage of the evening…and I can’t help but tapping my feet.I blame the Becks…at the moment the whole bar ( four of us + both barmaids) are united over the younger barmaid’s homemade Mexicano shots.Have to say better than any I have had in Berlin and that’s high praise…sometimes toilet signs can be confusing in pubs all over the world.Not here…

Got back last night and had forgotten what room I was in as I hadn’t taken the slip the hotel card came in and the keycards are clear.Luckily the reception was still there(same fella as before) says it happens all the time.They have more than 200 rooms here,which is less than I thought but still a good number.I’m just glad there was someone on reception…think he said it was his last hour so phew…

Laters…

Flat plains drifter…Germany #24

Walking back to the hotel last night,a very still warming evening,I heard some Latino music so headed to see what was going on and there were maybe fifty couples dancing the Tango.I wanted to take a video as it was quite a spectacle but I couldn’t see anyone else with their phones out and I know many Germans take exception to being filmed ( which I fully understand) and it’s hard to stop a couple mid flow to ask permission,sort of ruins the moment…looking at it made me see why a lot of women are attracted to men that can dance,especially the Latino dances like the Tango,simpatico movement an‘ all that stuff…

On the subject sex( don’t worry I’m not going there!) I realised I’m getting old as I walked past another bar,peered in,and saw an attractive scantily clad woman dancing on the table.My first thought wasn’t “ oh look an attractive scantily clad woman dancing on the table” it was “ I bet that’s a health & safety issue”  

Sometimes life is a lot less complicated when you’re old but also not as much fun…I didn’t go in.

Last full day in Düsseldorf and it’s blisteringly hot so of course I’m having a bottle of Peroni in the shade.One thing about this city is it’s great for just hanging out watching the world go by if that’s your thing.Very relaxing…got a three hour train journey to Bremen tomorrow so in no mood to knock myself out doing stupid stuff like moving around in the sun.I‘ll leave that to others…

 

Sitting outside an Italian/Turkish cafe this morning at 10am having coffee surrounded by hard as nails looking middle aged Turkish fellas all chowing down on elaborate ice creams is probably the most incongruous thing I’ve seen so far this trip.I wasn’t expecting them to be sporting uzis in support of the Ottoman Empire hunting Kurds but the macho metre was very low.Gotta say the ice cream looked damn good too…ice cream really is a huge thing in Germany and in truth the weather barely seems to matter…however not one of their eis shops plays an out of tune “Greensleeves” they clearly have much to learn…

The Brit stag party outside the bar over the way have already started flashing their hairy arses at passers bye and it’s just gone 4-30pm…think it could be a long night for some…

The one thing you do quickly notice about that long strip of bars is that it’s as much about  being seen as about getting trashed.There are many having a drink but there's probably just as many,if not more,parading themselves up and down the promenade in a desire to be seen & ogled at.Not me of course as I have already been immortalised by the world famous photographer known as “Some Polish Bloke”so I’m secure in my local fame…it’s a rich city and the rich need to show themselves…meanwhile the Auberge bar has rock chicks and that’s good enough for me thank you very much…

The parrots on Köningsalle are starting to get loud ( not as bad as the Walthamstow parrots but still loud) and it’s annoying so I’m on my way back to the hotel…

Next day and just pootling along waiting to checkout and I have also finally booked my last part of the trip which is not in Groningen but in Zeist which is part of Utrecht.I was waiting for a reply to a question I asked a hotel in Groningen but they never came back to me so I got this relatively cheap room instead…then that will be that.All over etc…

So goodbye Düsseldorf.Once again it’s been great and now off to Bremen in about half hour.Some confusion about if I have to chance at Munster.The board says yes but my app and the info desk says no…we shall find out one way or another.I expect the train to be rammed as it’s coming from Munich and going to Hamburg.Finding a seat will be fun.Wish me luck…

See ya all later…