A Mini Jaunt…Paris to Berlin.

Well that was almost a complete fuck up…the trip from Paris to Cologne was great.A few minutes late but I had 90 mins(+ injury time) to spare so wasn’t bothered.Went and had a smoke in the shadow of the cathedral then grabbed a sarnie.All good…luckily I checked the departure board and my train wasn’t on there but I gave it a few minutes just in case,after about ten minutes nothing appeared and I went to the information desk… 

First thing the fella did was a bit of tappy tappy on the keyboard then said “oh” which I didn’t need translating,he then did that thing we all dread and took control of my phone.Like most people I have nothing on there that I shouldn’t but anyone else thumbing through gives me the heebeegeebies.Anyway more tappy tappy,a consultation with a workmate and I was wondering where I could get a cheap hotel in Cologne and bin Berlin off all together…

Turns out my train doesn’t exist,whether this is the fault of Trainline or DB I don’t know.He said the next train is an hour later and asked if I still wanted it & if I did he’d print me off a ticket on a piece of A4…how quickly we go from Space age phone shit to relying on office stationary eh? 

So I’m on a later train anyway…mind you hasn’t actually arrived yet so…update;it’s at least half hour later.Luckily I know where the hotel in Berlin is and they’ve left me instructions on how to get access if I arrive after the reception has gone out clubbing.It’s all going terribly well…

At last I’m on my way,only two hours later! One Berlin train scheduled an hour later left  before ours and even a Flick train did too, a bloody flick train! I would say 85% of the trains leaving Cologne were late today.Christ know’s what’s happening to German trains but they’re mess…the actual trains are nice,far better than ours and the toilets work too but man alive they have major problems with punctuality which is the most un German thing ever…now I have to hope my hand printed ticket is  valid…thank god I’m allowed to smoke on the platform otherwise I’d be a nervous wreck…

I wasn’t planning on doing anything tonight except hang around the hotel cos’ I knew I’d be pooped but Deutscherbahn have made sure that any plans are stymied anyways.“thinking of going out having fun? Not on our watch sunshine “

Managed to get to the hotel & self check in at midnight.Not a bad journey despite the delays.Talking to a British couple who’s daughter is in the Berlin choir.We discussed world politics etc but of course mostly football and of course he told me he was beaten up in Wolves when we played Shrewsbury in 1979( I was there but didn’t beat anyone up) so a bit awkward.We laughed about it though…

Never did get my ticket checked…

A Mini Jaunt…Paris to Berlin.

Sitting outside Aux Ours in Gambetta Paris nursing some very cold & very lovely Weißbiers I have noticed a few things about Parisian life…these are not judgmental,far from it,just observations…

Baguettes are very much a thing,have seen  countless people carrying them to no doubt have with their evening meal.No strings of onions yet but that might just be a rural thing.Many many people of all ages still read books.It’s heartwarming to see.Bras seem to be considered  a wholly unnecessary item of clothing,again no judgement just observation,Older Parisian ladies,of say mid 70’s,all have the classic bob hairstyle,dress like they’re in a 50’s black & white film noir,wear far too much red lipstick and smoke in the exaggerated Bette Davies style,oh and they look fucking magnificent.Cheek kissing,yep still a thing.Parisian postal workers wear official jackets with the legend “La Postie” on the back and finally nobody wears PSG tops.I have seen three LA Raiders tops which is one more than the local team.I don’t think sports apparel is such a big thing in this town…

All good fun.Thought I’d take a stroll to my old haunt of two months ago and very happy to say they all remember me.That could be either good or bad but I’m sticking with the positive on this one…it’s just nice to be here with the sun shining,even after a few hours I feel revitalised.Hopefully Berlin has the same affect…

I forgot to mention zebra crossings earlier in my breakdown of all things cliched Parisian.I have talked about them before but most people repeat themselves after a couple of pints anyway…Do the French call them “zebra crossings?” Somehow I doubt it,they probably say they’re “The path of the striped horse “ or something.Also I have yet to see one that looks like it’s seen a lick of paint in twenty years but they are ubiquitous,from the bar I’m now sitting outside I can see seven without actually craning my neck.Madness…

There’s two youngish women sitting by me and one of them has a distinct Sid James laugh and I’m all for it…

So all in all yesterday was a good day in Paris.As it was only a one day stop over I felt no need to tourist so I did what I enjoy doing namely having a bevvy & talking bollocks.Ended the night with one of those conversations where neither person really knows what the other is banging on about but you sort of understand each other anyway…

Now I have just got on the train at Paris for the long haul to Berlin,first stop Brussels.I connect at Cologne a bit later and the big hope is that Deutschbahn have their shit together to get me to Berlin at some point today…as it’s Hexennacht today I’m not confident.

Laters…

A mini jaunt…Paris/Berlin/Paris.

I originally booked this trip on the back of a Eurostar special offer  for cheap ticket to Paris and decided to expand on that and get a train from Paris to Berlin too.As I have just done ten days in the French capital I figured it was time I got back to Berlin…even though that’s what I’m doing things have gone a bit south with the arrangements.This was all booked up before Christmas but a few weeks ago I got a message from Eurostar to say my return to Paris from Berlin had been cancelled owing to extensive track repairs scheduled.The original plan was one night in Paris,five nights in Berlin and finish with one last night in Paris…however now I can only do two full days in Berlin but luckily one of those is May Day.A day we used to celebrate in the UK before zero hour contracts turned us all into running dog lackeys of the imperialist state… 

May Day in Germany (Der Erste Mai,Tag der Arbeit) is still the workers day but it’s also a bit of a Halloween  crack but with usually more agreeable weather .The night before is witches night (Hexennacht) and there’s usually bonfires lit and I imagine drinking to be done.Basically what I’m saying is they make a festival out of the couple of days and if you‘ve spent over a week in Germany you’ll know that it’s illegal not to have a festival going on somewhere at any given moment…Luckily my favourite part of Berlin,Kreuzberg,has an all day street thing going on.I have also been warned it often ends up with a bit of a knockabout with the Polizei.Well you don’t have to threaten me with good time…

All that‘s in the future of course,currently I’m still in Blighty speeding towards the big hole that goes under the sea.The train isn’t rammed but it’s full enough.This morning was the easiest I’ve ever gone through passport control & bag checks.The longest part was putting my belt back through the hoops of my jeans.I really should get some special old man’s elasticated nylon strides whilst going through the Eurostar terminal…

Once again I’m gonna be staying in the 20th District (Menilmontant)  and it’s in a hotel I’ve stayed in before so I know where it is(ditto Berlin) also it’s only 30secs from the metro station which is handy as I have a fairly early train tomorrow for the nine hour trip with an hour wait at Cologne  thrown in as they obviously knew I’d want a smoke break.They‘re so thoughtful…only half hour out of Paris and it’s been a smooth as silk journey with the Brucie bonus of an unoccupied seat next to me also it looks like a gorgeous day out there…

Just got into the hotel,2nd floor,lift still not fixed from the last time I was here so the little legs are getting mucho work.I had also forgotten how much walking is involved in the Paris metro.Punters should really be charging for the shoe leather…soon as I landed in the cafe opposite Menilmontant metro there was a bit of an emergency with a young woman needing medical help.She had a spaced out look and general listful demeanour sadly all too common with too many drugs taken.Luckily the medics were on hand and she managed to walk with some assistance to the ambulance so hopefully she’ll be ok without the need of a stomach pumping which I can assure is not a pleasant experience…

Anyway the day is beautiful so I’m going to spend it in the only appropriate manner by sipping cold drinks outside a bar watching the world go by.It’s nice to be back…