Flat plains drifter…Netherlands #30

Statistically the Dutch are the tallest people on earth.Modern day Nephilims,as a result their interior design caters for this.For instance the peep hole on my hotel door is positioned just above my head,the mirror in the bathroom just about lets me see my forehead and the urinal in the bar last night was so high it was akin to a pissing contest at school…as someone who is not amongst the statistically tallest in the world this can be a challenge let me tell you…

Ah well,last day in Zeist,last day in Netherlands and indeed last day in mainland Europe.Once again it’s been great and once again I’m also eager to get back to Blighty too…

To honour my Dutch hosts I’m sporting my vivid orange t-shirt( the last clean top in the bag!) was going to wear black shorts too but looked far too much retro full kit wanker.The kit once again being circa 1974 where I could imagine myself as Johan Cryuff but that would be blasphemy as all we had in common was our smoking habit.Probably more of a Johnny Rep with my mad hair…

Working out the times for tomorrow earlier.I have to get a bus to the railway station then a train to Amsterdam to hook up with Eurostar.My train back to London isn’t until 1-40pm.I deliberately booked a later than normal train to give myself plenty of wriggle room…went across the road to my local bus stop and there’s no ticket machine so had to go app hunting on my phone yet again…

It says on my North Netherlands transport app I can get bus tickets but there’s no evidence of it but they have a specific local bus app so I downloaded that and hopefully it’s gonna work tomorrow morning ok…had a count up of how many local transport apps from all over Europe I have and it’s approaching forty.I have no clue where half of them are for and most of them are probably out of date and I’d imagine the vast majority need some sort of update…oh and at least 75% I’ll probably never use again but I’m loath to clear them away…

Be interesting to see if the Dutch border control is any different to the others,I doubt it is.The old joke of “ do you have any drugs? No? Want some?” Won’t ring true these days and I’m not making that joke either…

Barman just saw my Wolf’s head on my phone and we had a good John de Wolf discussion…

So coming to the end of the trip and i say this every time but it bears repeating.Not one ounce of shit from anyone.Everyone I have met in all the different places have been top notch with me and I’ve been made welcome everywhere.Take no heed of what Farage & his clan of Trump lickspittle spineless goons say…Europe is fine and I just wish we as a people would admit we’ve been suckered by liars,cheats & opportunist Putin/Trump suckups into Brexit and demand a re- vote into the EU sooner rather than later…

Even the little things make a difference.In a supermarket earlier getting some salami & rolls hovering by the bread section and a young girl  comes over talking to me.Of course I asked if she spoke English,which has to be the most redundant question in this country “do you want rolls? “ “ yes,two” “ can you wait thirty seconds?”  I wasn’t sure what was happening but she came back with two piping hot rolls from the oven.No need to do it but it was a sweet gesture…the rolls bin was already rammed but she just wanted to help me out.Sweet eh? 

I was saying earlier about everyone has been cool to me the last month.Well the fella I was chatting to earlier about John de Wolf sent me a drink over on the house…popped into the other bar and had a nice convo with one of the women with a dog.Strange but feel a bit connected to this odd little town…

Sorry this blog’s a bit longer than most but trying to cram a wee bit in on what will probably be the final one this summer unless Wolves do something extraordinary and I have to write it down.We have got Man City first game so…

Good start to the morning.Waiting at the bus stop trying to buy a ticket on the app( only valid an hour) bus came but it was 5 minutes early so obviously gonna wait…nope.Next one 25 minutes.This is why I give myself time in these circumstances but also whilst writing this a woman could see I was’nt paying attention to the bus sitting at the stop( a different one) and tapped me on the shoulder to tell me that it’s ready to go.Again helping for no other reason but to help…I like the Dutch.

Ok peeps i think this blog’s long enough.Currently waiting for the Amsterdam train…see you all soon and as the Dutch say…Doie Doie.

Flat plains drifter…Netherlands #29

So then my Interrail has finished.My prescription drugs are one day from finishing ( I miscalculated by a day,sure it’s fine) and I’m two days from finishing then getting the Eurostar from Amsterdam to London…oh yea and the bus I normally get from St Pancras to home has also finished but that’s another story…

Back in the bar with the sassy barmaid, it’s ok but I found one last night which I prefer.It’s closer to the hotel on a different road and walking past last night with no thought of going in there were three people outside with dogs and they all rushed towards me barking ( the dogs,not the people) but no teeth bared or anything so I thought fuck it i‘ll sit here and within a minute was happily petting all the dogs and engaging in small talk ( with the people,not the dogs) found my last local of the trip…I was even asked if I’d visit again before i left which doesn’t usually happen…on the way there is also an ice cream shop that yesterday lured me  in by the downright underhanded dirty trick of the boss sitting outside and saying “ hello” to me.The devious bastard.Needless to say it worked and no doubt will work again later.They know a mug when they see one…

One of my new mates…

Meanwhile it’s pissing down so might as well stop here for a bit knocking this out…

Saw a crash today.I say crash but let’s call it a shunt.A DHL truck backed up into a car at about 2mph,there was plenty of shouting and waving from passers by but he didn’t stop his rampage…it wiped out the front bumper & reg plate.Funny when you see a car triple somersault at 100mph,fall down a cliff then drive off with barely a scratch in the movies you barely question it…I think they could be lying.

Zeist seems a very well to do prosperous town as did Bilthoven too.I don’t know if it’s standard for small Dutch towns or just a northern Netherlands thing.They do seem to have a definite look about them too.Very orderly and clean and like Bilthoven a fairly young population.It’s a nice little place.Most of us have visions of The Netherlands based on Amsterdam,including myself before this visit,but that’s only a small section of the country.Like many think of Britain being like the cliched tourist version of London…was also told it’s pronounced “ Zaist” which is not at all like the three or four versions i came up with…

Only found out today that Black Sabbath’s most iconic tune “Paranoid” was nothing more than an album filler knocked up in a couple of hours to fill up a few minutes at the end of the LP.Amazing how these things sometimes happen…”How can I be the Prince of Darkness with a Brummie accent?” Once again RIP Ozzy…

As a matter of interest ( well to football fans maybe) the Dutch football association( KNVB) is based in Zeist.So kudos to Zeist…you lot still should have won the 1974 World Cup…

On that note of total football which couldn’t quite go total enough goodnight…

Flat plains drifter…Netherlands #28

I always suffer from a little bit of angst when catching a train in Europe.Mostly of the “ am i on the right one?” Variety.Understandable I suppose and luckily as yet I think it’s only happened once in ten years that I’ve been on the wrong train.The other main concern is if they suddenly change platforms at the last moment which is a fairly regular occurrence.It happened today but luckily it was only one platform over so no worries but occasionally there’s a sudden scurry on the platform,everyone grabbing their bags and rushing off somewhere and that  pushes the angst meter right up high…

Invariably it involves another train to the one I’m getting as most of the platforms are doubles and people are waiting for a multitude of trains…however when it is my train( or I think it is) I have to ask a guard otherwise if I blindly follow the crowd I could end up chasing my tail all over the station not knowing what’s going on…it’s only fun when you eventually get on your bloody train…

I never get angsty over my ticket,especially Interrail,as it’s always cool,neither do i about getting a seat despite  rarely reserving one.I stood today for the first part as it was only 45 minutes and it was easier than looking a seat…ho hum.I think what I’m trying to say is if you’re doing this type of thing for the first time it’s perfectly normal to get a bit edgy when dealing with European train travel but 99% of the time it all works out well and when it doesn’t at least you have a story to tell…

Currently crossing the border into the Netherlands.How can i tell? My mobile phone company told me of course…I wouldn’t have a Scooby where i was if it wasn’t for them…

Arrived! Four train changes and a bus ride.It all went very smoothly I must say.Had some angst getting a bus though.They’re always the worst if you don’t know the rules.The train’s easy.You get on,find a seat and show your ticket when asked with the bus things change from place to place.Is it the right bus? Do I just get on or do I scan my ticket? Am i sitting in the seat normally taken by Mavis the matriarch of the 56? Luckily the young bus driver talked me through it and even dropped me off at the corner where the hotel is…had to buy a ticket from the machine though as the app didn’t cover it…

When I got to Utrecht I had a version of their Greggs sausage roll,just as good & flakey.The Dutch eat as much crap as we do,drink as much as us & probably smoke more so how do they stay fitter? Here‘s how…

Two bloody flights of these to my room! The Dutch are worse than the Germans for their stairs…oh and the bikes built like tanks of course…

Found a bar close by.There’s a fair few and I’m central too.Floundering whilst ordering a drink and the girl said “order in English” so yea I did then said something about i should learn some Dutch and she said “ yes you should,this isn’t Amsterdam!” All with a disarming smile but with a little hint of resentment…gotta love the Dutch.They know how to make you feel welcome whilst turning the knife in your guts…

Talking of a knife in your guts.RIP Ozzy…

Flat plains drifter…Germany #27

Last day in Bremen,damn,last day in Germany…no idea when I will be back but hopefully next year.Have stocked up on cheap baccy to take back to Blighty.Not a great deal,maybe five packs but it’s something for our taxman to think about.Take that taxman…

Crossing the border into the Netherlands again tomorrow.Train journey look‘s like it’s a bit of a bugger but that’s life.I am staying in a little town called Zeist which sounds like it must mean something but apparently not,at least not in any dramatic way.I think when I saw it I was thinking of “Zeitgeist “ and thought that sounded pretty dammed cool…it’s a small town by Utrecht again just like Bilthoven is.Looks like I’m doing a tour of small towns in the northern Netherlands and in a way I am, like a struggling singer songwriter trying to find one lucky break…

However I didn’t really research this place properly,whilst genning up on it yesterday,looking at the local map etc it suddenly dawned on me there’s not an actual railway station there! Ooppps…the town where the train stops is Driebergen-Zeist a short bus ride away.Luckily I kept the local transport app on my phone so should be ok getting the bus just as long as I get the right one…should be fun,or not…

Currently back in Litfass bar in Viertel.Gonna have an afternoon in here and give Die Fliege a miss.Think I might need to be fully awake for the journey tomorrow morning/afternoon.Looks like at least a five hour job…

Besides I only have the cash I have in my pocket to last me until I get to the Netherlands because once again I got confused with my “going abroad “ bit on my bank app and can’t use the card again in Germany even if I wanted to.Haha I have yet to get this bloody thing 100% correct but at least I visited the atm yesterday for some cash…

Germany is still a cash heavy society,especially in the sorts of bars I enjoy going to.If in doubt ask before ordering drinks.Saw a fella order a few bevvies in the Auberge Düsseldorf and try to pay by card despite there being signs all over the place about it being cash only.He might have been trying to pull a fast one but was politely pointed towards the atm next door and told to get the appropriate cash out and advised that other bars on the strip might not be so pleasant in their approach if he tried it on those.Think he got the message…

At least German WiFi is improving,and about time too,had hardly any problems with gaining access to the whole damn world of internet tomfoolery this time around…even the trains haven’t been too bad.Famous last words with one last trip tomorrow!

The bar I’m in are playing some Goldie Looking Chain and some of the locals are looking a bit confused.The ultimate in culture crossover…Welsh rap in Germany.Hahaha…

I will miss Bremen.It‘s a cool city.If you‘ve not been you should take a visit unless you’re any of the things above in which case Bremen’s not the city for you.Actually nowhere is the place for you…

Laters all…

Flat plains drifter…Germany #26

There are many good things about German stations but one probably overlooked is being able to stroll in,grab a takeaway coffee and go up to a platform for a quiet sup & smoke without getting a stream of people asking for a smoke or change outside.I feel like I’m in my own little heaven…yes I’m easily pleased.Mind you it’s not a foolproof plan as no sooner had I written that paragraph someone came up and asked for a smoke.Even up in these rarified heights life finds a way…

When I was here in Bremen about a month ago it was very hot & sunny and it would appear to be that way again.So if you want that sort of caper you know where to go…Bremen is a very green city, I don’t mean environmentally,although it’s generally lefty leaning politics suggests that would be the case anyway,but just in general.There a few parks of course and also most of the riverside is green but get just outside the centre and many of the streets are gloriously tree lined,most of them are fully matured too which also gives a lot of shade.With the large six stories housing it’s got the look of a middle class leafy London suburb but in a good way not a Abigail’s Party kinda way…

Just had a Currywurst with toast instead of Pommes and it was lovely & cheap ( €4-50) actually it was better than normal as I find they over salt the Pommes and usually there’s too many which tends to fill me up too easily.Plus,and I know this is sacrilege,they slaver far too much mayo & red sauce on.Having said all that it can still be a wonderful thing…and I still haven’t had my ice cream.Maybe later…

Got my ice cream! Only joking,it’s fine once it’s calmed down…

One thing I will have to do when I get home is renew my phone.It’s already about 18 months out of its contract and to be honest the phone is working fine & in good condition which is more than be said for the lead & connection which is beginning to play up & give me die Angst…

Got my ice cream.Mint of course with added brain freeze of course…

The seagulls are starting to make a racket which means one of two things: There’s a hawk nearby or someone’s just bought chips…

Found my way back into Die Fliege and at €2-50 a bottle of Becks why not? It’s pretty packed ( about 20 people) and the barmaid made me pay upfront.I tell you man the place has changed…I have even lost my regular chair and not one person shouted out “Norm!” when I walked in.Can’t see me staying here for more than three or four…

I only stayed for two in the end as the barmaid( 4th different one in two days) charged another price for the second Becks and I can’t be doing with arbitrary charges at my age…

On that consumer bombshell goodnight…

Flat plains drifter…Germany #25

Phew.Confusion solved.The board was “economic with the truth” by not showing Bremen as a stop until the train was actually coming in.They do this sometimes the little scamps…I have even found a free table despite it being packed as expected.I don’t know if this is because they’ve failed to put the reserve signs on the seats or I have just been lucky.Also the seats opposite with noisy kids have just vacated to elsewhere…yes the train’s late but all things considered I’m doing ok so far…

Does anyone else think it’s slightly weird that Germany has a city named Essen? It means “Eat”

Got to the hotel and the fella remembered me from a month ago.Asked about the trip etc so that was sweet of him.Must see hundreds of people weekly…anyway on the opposite side of the hotel this time and I have to be careful as I’m only three floors up facing The Hauptbahnhof & tram/bus station with huge windows.Last time I was facing a wall so was quite happy traipsing around buck naked however I don’t want to alarm the natives this time around…

Was hunting locally for an Eis shop cos’ I really fancied some ice cream but found myself going past Die Fliege and remembered it being nice & cool in there so beer it is out of the heat…the same old duffers are in here along with this old duffer…oh and Die Fliege is apparently the German name for The Flying Dutchman which also used to be a pub on the Warstones estate in Wolverhampton too if I remember correctly.I suppose we’re closer to the source here than a sink estate in The Black Country is…their musical taste is varied to say the least from Yes to Bananarama with a sea shanty in between…

That eternal question has raised its head again.Laundy or not laundry? It’s now the 19th and I’m back on Eurostar on the 25th.I think I can last,socks not a problem as I can always go bare.Under crackers also on as long as…well you know.T-shirts getting low again though but I think I can see it through if I double up however there might be someone saying “ god I was sitting by a right smelly bastard from Amsterdam” it’s a risk I’m prepared to take though.Sod the laundry!

Took a stroll around my floor in the hotel earlier ( ie got lost) I had no concept how many rooms it has.There must be 60/70 rooms on my floor and there’s six floors.Bloody hell.The rooms are ok too.A fair size with a bathroom…

We are now on to spandex bouffant haired 80’s power rock stage of the evening…and I can’t help but tapping my feet.I blame the Becks…at the moment the whole bar ( four of us + both barmaids) are united over the younger barmaid’s homemade Mexicano shots.Have to say better than any I have had in Berlin and that’s high praise…sometimes toilet signs can be confusing in pubs all over the world.Not here…

Got back last night and had forgotten what room I was in as I hadn’t taken the slip the hotel card came in and the keycards are clear.Luckily the reception was still there(same fella as before) says it happens all the time.They have more than 200 rooms here,which is less than I thought but still a good number.I’m just glad there was someone on reception…think he said it was his last hour so phew…

Laters…

Flat plains drifter…Germany #24

Walking back to the hotel last night,a very still warming evening,I heard some Latino music so headed to see what was going on and there were maybe fifty couples dancing the Tango.I wanted to take a video as it was quite a spectacle but I couldn’t see anyone else with their phones out and I know many Germans take exception to being filmed ( which I fully understand) and it’s hard to stop a couple mid flow to ask permission,sort of ruins the moment…looking at it made me see why a lot of women are attracted to men that can dance,especially the Latino dances like the Tango,simpatico movement an‘ all that stuff…

On the subject sex( don’t worry I’m not going there!) I realised I’m getting old as I walked past another bar,peered in,and saw an attractive scantily clad woman dancing on the table.My first thought wasn’t “ oh look an attractive scantily clad woman dancing on the table” it was “ I bet that’s a health & safety issue”  

Sometimes life is a lot less complicated when you’re old but also not as much fun…I didn’t go in.

Last full day in Düsseldorf and it’s blisteringly hot so of course I’m having a bottle of Peroni in the shade.One thing about this city is it’s great for just hanging out watching the world go by if that’s your thing.Very relaxing…got a three hour train journey to Bremen tomorrow so in no mood to knock myself out doing stupid stuff like moving around in the sun.I‘ll leave that to others…

 

Sitting outside an Italian/Turkish cafe this morning at 10am having coffee surrounded by hard as nails looking middle aged Turkish fellas all chowing down on elaborate ice creams is probably the most incongruous thing I’ve seen so far this trip.I wasn’t expecting them to be sporting uzis in support of the Ottoman Empire hunting Kurds but the macho metre was very low.Gotta say the ice cream looked damn good too…ice cream really is a huge thing in Germany and in truth the weather barely seems to matter…however not one of their eis shops plays an out of tune “Greensleeves” they clearly have much to learn…

The Brit stag party outside the bar over the way have already started flashing their hairy arses at passers bye and it’s just gone 4-30pm…think it could be a long night for some…

The one thing you do quickly notice about that long strip of bars is that it’s as much about  being seen as about getting trashed.There are many having a drink but there's probably just as many,if not more,parading themselves up and down the promenade in a desire to be seen & ogled at.Not me of course as I have already been immortalised by the world famous photographer known as “Some Polish Bloke”so I’m secure in my local fame…it’s a rich city and the rich need to show themselves…meanwhile the Auberge bar has rock chicks and that’s good enough for me thank you very much…

The parrots on Köningsalle are starting to get loud ( not as bad as the Walthamstow parrots but still loud) and it’s annoying so I’m on my way back to the hotel…

Next day and just pootling along waiting to checkout and I have also finally booked my last part of the trip which is not in Groningen but in Zeist which is part of Utrecht.I was waiting for a reply to a question I asked a hotel in Groningen but they never came back to me so I got this relatively cheap room instead…then that will be that.All over etc…

So goodbye Düsseldorf.Once again it’s been great and now off to Bremen in about half hour.Some confusion about if I have to chance at Munster.The board says yes but my app and the info desk says no…we shall find out one way or another.I expect the train to be rammed as it’s coming from Munich and going to Hamburg.Finding a seat will be fun.Wish me luck…

See ya all later…

Flat plains drifter…Germany #23

Sitting in a cafe bar at 10-30am next to Carlsplatz market having my morning coffee and a fella sits down close by,orders an Altbier ( it’s the local brew served in small tumbler glasses) looks at his phone for maybe a minute then gets up and walks off without touching his beer.The waitress even looked over to me to see if I knew what had happened but obviously not…she did say that at least he paid upfront! Not an earth shattering occurrence I grant you but one of life‘s little mysteries…

Carlsplatz is a small market on the edge of Altstadt.Probably half a football pitch in size but walk through and you get assaulted by the smells of every fresh food & flowers imaginable.There’s also numerous little cafe bars too plus a few craft shops.It appears expensive but I’m not too sure it is…I’m not a market person but it’s always a pleasure to stroll around there…

Just bumped into my old mate Mr Paparazzi again strolling around the town.Now if I were paranoid…anyway he said if I WhatsApp him he’ll send me the pic so that was good of him…all this attention is beginning to turn my head.How long before I start lashing out or wearing a bag over my head? ( insert own jokes here)

Not bad pics.No charge either…

Currently having a Weißbier down by the Rhine.There’s a raft of cafe bars on the promenade which always seem to do good business whenever I’m down here.I don’t know if they bother to open during the winter months as I guess it can get pretty bleak however the one I use has two huge screens they show various sports on so maybe they open for big football games at that time.It would pull in local punters that’s for sure and the overhead canopies do appear to big heaters attached so maybe they do…sorry I’m rambling a bit.

Anyway I had better start looking at the final leg of my trip soon.I’m here for another full day after today then Bremen for three days before a final three days in the Netherlands.I don’t have to go there of course but I’m due to get the Eurostar from Amsterdam on the afternoon of the 25th so want to be relatively close to there…I had said Groningen but might see if I can get closer.I might even check out Amsterdam itself.It’s a hard life eh?

Having a look through various social media sites and there seems to be a profusion of MAGA types saying things like “ well I have supported Trump for ten years but enough is enough” and all I am seeing is “ I am a really really bad judge of character and have been all my life” Nobody with either brains or ethics saw Trump for anything than he ever was and you can’t absolve yourself from blame for allowing your country to become a cesspool of hate & cruelty by sitting in the social media confessional box hoping a quick three hail Mary’s will wash away all the shit you and your kind have,and continue to do,put everyone through.It’s gonna get a lot worse you stupid fuckers…whilst the hook “Fuck around and find out” is cute and funny it implies only the terminally stupid are finding out whereas in fact we all are except many of us knew what would happen as soon as the mentally deficient voted him in…

Sorry went off on one but it can’t be ignored…sadly the whole world is linked to what happens in the USA…maybe this is the ideal opportunity for the rest of us to cut ties or at least cut dependence with them…

That’s my lot for today,sorry about being a bit ranty at the end there…

Flat plains drifter…Germany #22

It’s one of those raincoat & sunglasses type of days with the odd “ fuck me here’s an enormous downpour better jump into a bar” episodes thrown in.The good thing about being in the Altstadt Düsseldorf is there’s never an excuse to get caught out by the rain as there’s bars everywhere…and sometimes something weird might happen like just now a photographer ( Polish fella) came over to ask if he could take a pic of me for his portfolio.I laughed and asked why and he said my face has character( ie an auld fucker) but he insisted I didn’t smile( exude dahlink ! No he didn’t say that) anyway I was chuffed and the pic was good too…gonna check out his instagram page later…

Anyway after 30 seconds of being an unwitting victim of the paparazzi the rain’s coming in again so it looks like I’m stuck here for a wee bit…

I am in a different part of  Düsseldorf than normal.Still relatively close to the Hauptbahnhof but slightly rougher than where I’d usually stay.First thing I noticed was outside the station they’d cleared away a lot of the street people.Turns out they’d moved on to close to where I’m staying.Probably half a dozen little groups of around thirty altogether.They didn’t trouble me at all as I walked through them…this city does seem to have a fair problem with those that have fallen through the cracks for one reason or another.To be fair probably no more or less than many but they’re more visible here…which is especially true as you sit outside one of the bars in the Altstadt…

Something I saw today rankled with me though.As I was walking up a narrow alley there was a church at the end with a funeral taking place.The coffin was just being driven off and the mourners were milling around outside no doubt waiting to follow.I stood back out of respect not wanting to barge through but then I noticed not ten feet away from the mourners two beggars holding cups out towards them.Now if people are genuinely homeless I have sympathy however sometimes it’s not about you and there’s a thing called reading the room.I know many people who would have been justified in twatting the fuckers…

This all sounds like I’m having a pop at Düsseldorf but far from it.This is my fifth or sixth visit over the years so clearly I have a lot of love for the city but neither am I going to paper over the cracks of it‘s evident problems…oddly enough just had to tell someone off who tried to bother me whilst eating.This time though it was a god botherer trying flog me stuff…haha I’m going to hell…

There’s some loud English types in the bar at the moment.Probably starting a crawl that might not extend past this stretch( maybe 40 bars) meanwhile I’m hanging around until my favourite little Düsseldorf shithole opens in about an hour so I can talk football with the English barman.Unfortunately he’s a Chelsea fan but I’m just gonna have to suck that fact up…

It was good to see Gary and be in the Auberge bar again.Luckily we didn’t discuss football much but when he inevitably bought up the subject of Chelsea being world club champions I had to remind him as Trump hijacked the whole ceremony the title really belongs to him…anyway the Auberge bar is like a smaller version of the Giffard in Wolverhampton but with less frills…

That’s it for today my lovelies…see ya.

Flat plains drifter…Germany #21

Last word on Magdeburg.What you notice as an English speaking tourist in cities not geared to international tourism ie Berlin,Hamburg,Munich etc is a lack of English anywhere.On street signs,menus or just in general and very few people bother with it.Magdeburg is not a small place by any imagination it’s just not required so many don’t bother and why should they? It’s up to us to get round it…even though my German skills are practically non existent I can read a menu sufficiently to know when I’m ordering chicken instead of live squid…you get by.

Got the train fine,an empty double decker,as I got on the rains came and for the next hundred miles or so followed us cross country.It was the sort of rain that basically comes from one massive cloud blanketed across the visible sky,flies in horizontally and defies you to be outside in it,luckily I was‘nt…

I know many of you would find such a journey dull but I love the endless fields of crops that span to the horizon only interspersed occasionally with a village of twenty odd houses and a church…there’s also regiments of pylons marching off into the distance sometimes being waved on by wind turbines.It’s only when you see them together you realise how bloody massive those wind turbines are…out of nowhere the train cuts through dark forbidding forests where nightmares are born…the rain just added to the mystery of it all for me…

When I was a kid I went to Austria with my mum a couple of times and one of those trips involved a coach journey through Germany.My abiding memory is having an early breakfast then heading off down the road( too small to be an Autobahn) Fields that stretched for ever either side covered with an early morning mist as the sun came up.It’s stuck with me all these years.Sorry getting a bit flowery here…

Outside Hannover station having a smoke and I have to say there were a good few damaged people around,incidentally Hannover is where our royal family originally came from.Just saying…

By the way I’m currently on the train to Düsseldorf and the weather has turned into “ wear a coat or stay in the pub?” Type of day…

 

If you’re ever on a German train the chances are you’ll be aware of their love for an allotment,much as we have the same love.Most of the times coming into a town or city the first thing you see is a well structured fairly large allotment,usually with a well built shed adorned with a German flag.It’s one of the very few times you’ll see a German flag flying oddly…anyway they all look very nice and well maintained an’ all that and as I was on a nostalgia trip the buildings look a bit pre-fab and got me thinking of the term “Jerry built” not something you hear these days but back in the day it was quite the insult,something knocked up quickly which will collapse equally quickly…of course the “Jerry built” pre fabs outlasted their original use by decades and after about 40/50 years became much sought after properties…irony sweet irony.

Had to change my plans slightly and ignore going to Aachen in favour of a return to Bremen for three days.For some reason the hotel prices are double and I don’t want to visit that badly.Groningen is still on at the moment but the Netherlands hotels seem to be expensive no matter where you go…we will see.

Coming into the Ruhr Valley now.Another one of my favourite vista from the train being as it’s virtually wall to wall factories from Bielefeld to Düsseldorf…it’s the innate Yamyam in me I’m afraid…if there was a river gorge or mountain pass on this trip I’d probably never leave the train!

That’s all for today.More tomorrow hopefully…ta ta for now.

Flat plains drifter…Germany #20

Last day in Magdeburg.Only a short stay over as I’m off to Düsseldorf in the morning.Even though it’s not particularly far it’s gonna take nearly five hours although one of those hours will be at Hannover as the original change gave me just five minutes to get the connection and frankly I’d rather hang around for an hour than put myself in a tizzy chasing my tail trying to make the train on time,and that’s all before the vagaries of DB kick in…this is why Interrail is good if you need to chop & change trains at any time…

Think I will try to do that most English thing today and attempt to listen to the cricket whilst abroad…got my airhead AirPods with me and after a few false dawns last night got them working again.Turns out I had pressed a wrong button on the app and silenced them or something.I don’t know really,they’re working now so the trick is to never ever visit the app again and hope they keep working.I‘m a technical genius after all…looks like we have got some of the British sunshine too!

Breakfast today is gonna be apple strudel with ice cream.Or it could be lunch.Who cares? If only there was a word that describes an inbetween meal…

Not successful in the listening to Test Match Special on my phone so will have to make do with BBC updates.Hopefully won’t last too long after lunch ( theirs not mine as I’m having Weißbier for my lunch)

Walking around Magdeburg and it appears the streets are empty on a Monday afternoon which is most unusual for a German city.Many of the shopping areas are rammed in all the ones I’ve been to over the years.I thought it might be because it’s more spread out than most but then I went into one of the many malls here in search of a REWE supermarket and I found where all the people were…packed to the gills.

Still not found what I would term a “proper “ bar and it’s not looking hopeful ( ie I have stopped looking) They are fairly rare in Germany as most places seem to be food oriented whereas our pubs are the opposite…even though I have only been knocked back once with just having a drink I still ask.That knock back was in Mainz where every other bar was teaming and this one was empty insisting food be bought.Seemed to be a colossal own goal to my eyes…

So there we have it.Magdeburg is worth a visit but maybe no more than two days.It badly lacks a focal point in the city being too spread out and also it has an area named Reform and if that doesn’t make any self respecting fella go limp nothing will…in sharp contrast where I’m going to tomorrow,Düsseldorf,is probably one big focal point having more bars than any place has a right to have in about half a square mile.I love Düsseldorf…

Had an old fella perch himself at my table just.Pissed and getting more so.Shouting at the sparrows & spitting when he spoke.It was a bad half hour but my look of relief must have resignated with the waitress when he paid up and left cos‘ I definitely got a sympathetic sideways glance…think he was a regular visitor.Luck of the draw when travelling on your own…to be fair he wasn’t aggressive with me or anything I just think he wanted someone to vent to even if they didn’t have a Scobby what he was on about.I picked up a few things but not a lot between dodging the sprays….ho hum.

Laters Peeps…

Flat plains drifter…Germany #19

The sun‘s out and I left my shades back in the hotel…mind you I’m under cover having lunch & beer so ho hum.Had another soup,this time tomato and it was as good as yesterday‘s and also €2 cheaper ( different cafe bar) I doing more soup as a meal as I find a pub meal,either in mainland Europe or back in the UK,is always far too big for me and I don’t like wasting food…

So then Magdeburg? I can’t get a handle on the place,now as a caveat it’s a Sunday and Sunday’s in Germany are generally weird days to suss out a new city,however the layout has confused me somewhat.Lots of very long wide boulevards with no discernible centre as far as I can tell,everything seems too spread out…most German Altstadt‘s are old or rebuilt as old,centres where everything gravitates from but that doesn’t seem to be the case here.I might have missed an important turn off somewhere and be completely wrong of course…

Even so the place appears very friendly.Not many tourists although a few Germans on tour as it’s a historic city and plenty of hotels which makes me think it could be a large conference area being pretty central and all that but not being Berlin where there’s too many distractions…

There are a good few historic old buildings knocking around especially churches and the like but my favourite is a place called Hundertwasser Grüne Zitadelle which a fairly big pink building which looks like it was designed by Salvador Dali,The Grimms & Lewis Carroll on an acid trip and the council decided that was the best they were gonna get from them so went with it.It’s glorious and what’s better is there are numerous coffee shops etc inside the inner courtyards…well worth a visit…

And the birds can live here free of charge too…I bet the sparrows have already taken over the little freeloaders….

Just seen that Live Aid was 40 years ago today.We all have our memories of it and mine is watching it all day & all night in my local when I lived in Southampton and it’s the first time I’d been in a pub the didn’t close for the best part of 24 hours…funnily enough that feat never managed to feed the world…

Anyway back in the hotel now and on reflection maybe I was harsh on Magdeburg earlier.I walked past a few places that had filled up and appeared ok.Some places you just happen into good bars by accident but others you probably need either more time to suss it out or some inside knowledge and I think this town might be the latter rather than former…

Laters peeps…

Flat plains drifter…Germany #18

I can tell I’m still in the old GDR cos’ of the sparrows.Old East Germany is the only place I see the little fuckers…I’m sure the Stasi stole them all from London and forbade them to leave…

Got to Magdeburg fine,the hotel is a short walk from the Hauptbahnhof and all’s good,it has a lift and everything…oh and a six digit number to access front door & hotel room so I’d better not lose that…

Just having a look around locally and I’m clearly in the bit away from the normal Saturday shenanigans but it’s ok,found a friendly cafe bar and having a Budweiser ( a real one naturally) might go crazy and eat something later.The Kartoffelsuppe ( potato soup) looks appealing.Don’t be fooled into thinking the old GDR is cheap as chips.Their food prices are pretty steep..,

Whilst I had time in my room earlier I booked up four days in Düsseldorf after this.Then I still have six days left and will probably do what I intended and do Aachen and Groningen…definitely doing Groningen if only because the “ Gron”bit is pronounced all phlegmy like an Afrikaner dry heaving…

Just realised the cafe bar I’m in is a Czech/ German fusion…ie extra dumplings with everything!

Well that Kartoffelsuppe was to die for.It nearly gave me a heart attack! Seriously though it started off pretty thin and I wondered what the hell this was but once the potatoes & veg started to mix it got thicker & thicker.Lovey heated large bread roll with it too.Just the job…

More shocking news! I seem to have lost weight as I’m actually able to do some buttons up on my shirt.( even if they’re a little tight)More news to follow after the weather…yep still pissing down.Mind you it’s a boon for the cafe bar I’m in as loads of people are seeking shelter.Every cloud an’ all that…

Every button! Not seen the like for years and not as much breathing in as you might think…ok a little bit but even so( no doubt it will soon go back on)

Because my little raincoat was soaked I decided to dry it off hanging up in the bathroom.Because I’m a heathen I hung it up by it‘s hood rather than the hook provided.Because I’m an old fella I need to visit the bathroom several times a night and because I forget things I gave myself a cheap horror movie jump scare at about 3-30am…

Flat plains drifter…Germany #17

Had a good night in Kreuzberg last night.Didn’t get to see everyone I wanted to but hey ho…ending up in the Wild at Heart naturally.Two bands on,ok but not brilliant.The first was an all woman trio named Matching Drapes which earned them a gold star straight away! 

Apparently this was their final gig together.Was chatting to the lead guitarist after the gig,French Canadian,and she said she had to go home so the band were splitting.Shame but there you go…

This is my final day in Berlin,off to Magdeburg tomorrow morning.It’s only a couple of hours on the train so shouldn’t be too much of a problem.Not been before so looking forward to it…

This trip to Berlin has been a lot quieter than normal.Partly cos’ I’m naturally slowing down as I get older but also because of where I’m staying this time.Even the Aussie barman blew out his cheeks a bit when he asked where I was staying and he’d travelled half way round the world to be there !  

For instance it took two hours to get from Kreuzberg to my place.No hold ups,that was the journey time so I had to leave at 10-30 to get the last tram from Alexanderplatz.I’m not complaining as I had to go cheaper this time and no matter where you go you’re not gonna get a central hotel for cheap….

For all you smokers out there ( hello Mr H) this might be of interest to you.When I am in Germany I usually buy pre rolled normal tabs which are about €9 for twenty but you can get packs for €10/€15 and €20.Those €20 packs have about fifty tabs in them and are stupidly massive…at home I usually roll my own and a 30gram pack is £22/23.In the Netherlands an equivalent pack is €15 but in Germany it’s €6-50…I can’t make sense of it all and I can’t even blame Brexit either cos’ French smokes are pretty much the same price as the UK…as an aside I’m alternating between the two genres at the moment depending on my mood…

Had my ticket checked three times now in less than a day so if you’re coming here know that they’re on the ball and they will haul you off the train and fine you..,

Loads of Yorkies in a bar just now with Sheff Utd,Huddersfield,Hull City and,er,Barcelona tops on. No Leeds though,I suppose they wouldn’t have all fit in the bar…Funny thing is I was waiting by the tram stop next to the bar for about fifteen minutes and I didn’t hear one laugh out of them,not even a chortle.Rum lot the Yorkies…

After a good farewell night in my “ local” drinking heavier than expected and talking as much Yamyam bollocks as expected I was in luck this morning when my tram arrived just as I got to the stop and also just as the rain began barrelling down…on the train to Magdeburg.Goodbye Berlin,been great as usual albeit a wee bit quieter too…

The quiet time is probably down to location and also the weather too.I have bought the British summer with me whilst you lot in Blighty have been roasting…

Berlin Hauptbahnhof was heaving as usual.There’s some sort of scam going on with about a dozen women roaming around showing their phones to people on what I presume is a translation page,no idea what the scam is but it’s clearly organised…

My train was late naturally but only by ten minutes so I think that counts as on time or even early in Germany…again it’s a double decker but this time upstairs was rammed so had to make do with the lower decks like Jack in Titanic…

Ok boys & girls that’s it for today…

Flat plains drifter…Germany #16

I don’t know if  “ You don’t come to Berlin for the weather “ is a saying but it should be cos’ since I have been here it’s gone full British Summer climate with knobs on…luckily I bought my trusty Primark thin raincoat with me hoping I’d never have to get it out of mothballs but of course I was wrong…

Made it to Kreuzberg and currently having a coffee on the other side of the road to where my bars are.It’s nice though sitting here watching the rain pour down.Good coffee too…

Made it to Bar 11…it’s 3-30pm and the barman is already sinking shots of Jagermeister.Anyway I’m on my first Weißbier of the trip and it’s lovely…in the cafe I was outside having a coffee at earlier an angry Russian women ( she was on a hands free call) was rolling a spliff.The owner came out and speaking English with her said something like “ I don’t mind you doing that but go inside so Polizei don’t walk past & see it,this is my business and all they need is an excuse” that was the jist and seemed fair enough but of course she went apeshit and eventually stormed off chucking stuff off the table etc.The fella looked at me with a resigned “ what can you do?” look and it was hard not to side with him…judging by how much skunk she was piling in the spliff I’m not surprised she was unhinged.That’s some strong shit ( apparently)

They’re now playing a tune that’s taken me all the way back to the Tavern in the Town days in Wolverhampton.It’s Freebird by Lynard Skynard which in all honesty is a god awful dirge except the three minute guitar solo that closes it out.Still,happy memories an’ all that…

Anyway my spider bite on the hand appears to have healed up.The swelling & itching has done down pretty much over night.Must have been a common all garden spider cos’ as far as I know I haven’t developed any spidery superpowers unless you count an inability to get out of the bath with any dignity…

Looking at the bite marks those fangs were pretty wide apart.That was a big bastard that had a go at me…

Shame the landlord of Madonna isn’t around tonight.We normally have a good football & old farts music chat.There’s an Aussies lad there tonight wo seems ok but no way am I discussing any kind of sport with an Aussies!

Glad to say I had my ticket checked earlier on coming into Kreuzberg.Always feel vindicated when it gets looked over at some stage.They hauled out a food dispatch rider with his bike.Don’t know if he bribed them with his pizza delivery or not…

Turns out the Aussie barman is not a cricket fan.Result…

Did a bit by falling on the floor on the U-Bahn home.I wasn’t even drunk.The damn train lurched as I got up to get off and sent me flying right in front of a woman who looked at me with total disdain.Still never mind won’t see her again,until of course I got on the tram for the final leg of the journey home and there she was…and she still looked disgusted.

Haha no harm done.Laters…

Flat plains drifter…Germany #15

It only takes a second visit to a new bar to establish you have a regular seat.Mine in my “ local” is outside where there are only two tables with six chairs at each.I was the only one there for a while then two women in their 30’s sat at the other table.We made small talk and they were from Paraguay,working here.As we spoke they sparked up huge fuck off cigars.It was like a Che Guevara wet dream…then two hairy blokes sat next to me,possible bikers,possible musos,possibly both.We didn’t talk much…

Two older women of about 75 then sat at the same table,they were riding council  mobility scooters,parked up,ordered huge cocktails  and continued to drink,smoke and laugh the night away.Finally my new Yamyam mate turned up and as he speaks German the two tables started to have a right good natter.Turned out to be  good night out of nothing special…the bar is one of those where you have to go inside after 10pm so as not to disturb the neighbours and as you can imagine the convo was getting louder & louder and as anyone who knows me will testify I can get unusually loud for a little fella.I try not to but can’t help it…das auslander waking the neighbours!

It pays to research and I didn’t.Went down to Kreuzberg with the intention of visiting my three favourite shithole little bars and making a night of it,despite dodging numerous showers and got there expecting Bar 11 to be open but knock me sideways it was closed and didn’t open for another two hours.I could have walked around but frankly couldn’t be arsed so grabbed a coffee somewhere and got a bus back to Wittenbergplatz…So tomorrow I will start out later to visit Bar 11,Madonna and,depending on how knackered I am,Wild at Heart…I will feel as though I’m cheating myself if I fail to visit my three favourite little shithole bars…I still feel odd calling “Madonna” bar in the singular even though that’s it’s name and it can also lead to lots of Carry On type double entendre…fnnnr fnnnr.

Got a fella in front of me in the bar I’m in who’s just come back from the bogs sniffing furiously and twitchy as fuck.At the moment he’s ringing people on his phone like mad just to talk to someone.I just hope he doesn’t turn round and want to talk to me! Saved! He’s just had a mate turn up.Phew…

Back to my “ local” and my seat’s been taken by bloody locals if you please .Bloody check.They clearly don’t know who I think I am…

Anyway a good night talking bollocks and today my only objective is to get coffee then head down to Kreuzberg for a session.Very nearly failed at the coffee thing.Waited ages outside a cafe whilst the waitress served loads of people around me.Eventually I stormed off in a huff and of course absolutely nobody noticed…found another place which undoubtedly has better coffee anyway…next stop Kreuzberg but not as early as yesterday…

My go to beer whilst in Germany is Weißbier.Have been in the country ten days now and yet to have one.No idea why.That will probably be rectified later on…

Until tomorrow then…

Flat plains drifter…Germany #14

Sitting outside my “local” last night contemplating ordering a small nightcap when the landlady came out dragging a clearly reluctant bloke behind her,pointing at me saying “ Englander!” She pushed him towards me and even though he had no interest said “ all right mate” ah so she was excited cos’ there were now two Engländers in her far away from the tourist maelstrom of Berlin bar…we exchanged a few cursory pleasantries but something he said made me think he was a fellow Yamyam so tried my luck and asked where he was from and sure enough “ Wolverhampton “ I think he noticed my smile of recognition and from once being recalcitrant correspondents the drinks began flowing and the inane Yamyam chatter started…

Anyway he lived in Germany,had done for many years,in Belefeld ( which is a long standing conspiracy theory practical joke Germans play.Look it up) and worked on the Grand Prix circuit world wide…nice fella,very Wolves,you know chatty about everything as we all are! The landlady was well chuffed and even more so when she found out my dad was Czech just like her! It also turned out Wayne and I were staying in the same hotel and not only that but in next door rooms.It’s a weird world sometimes…my only complaint was he is a Villa fan.Bastard…brightened up the evening anyway…

On a much more serious note I may have seen a young fella pass away today,or at least be close to it.Was having a coffee in Alexanderplatz and in the coffee house over the road a young( maybe early 20’s) lad had collapsed.He was being looked after and when the ambulance came they didn’t seem in too much hurry with him even though he still looked completely limp & lifeless…I suppose them not giving CPR was a good sign in a way.I’m only guessing but it looked like a classic drugs overdose.Hope the lad recovered…

On a far less serious note but no less urgent the laundry needs doing tomorrow morning.One clean t-shirt left,one pair of socks and no knickers…I have looked at the machine and there appears to be an express 15 minute button which would be perfect for me if it’s that simple.In actual laundromats it’s easy.Put money there,press that button,wait…household appliances come with instructions that nobody reads even if they could understand the language…

Ah the biting has started.Got one one my hand and one on my elbow.Luckily not as bad as it has been before.Still have some cream and will also have start spraying my anti mosquito stuff on myself before going to bed.It also protects from West Nile virus and probably Ebola & also the dreaded Heebeegeebees too…

Actually think that’s a spider bite rather than mosquito…

Back in my “ local” after a hard day fannying around.Don’t know if my new bestest mate in the world ever will pop in.Think he said he only finished early yesterday cos’ of the storm and today is nice and sunny.Good mosquito weather…I am actually now quite enjoying this relaxed vibe.Will no doubt reacquaint myself with Kreuzberg at some stage later in the week when I have clean clobber on…

Next day.Hand has swollen a bit more but I think it’s gonna be ok.Washing done now just drying.Managed to work things out sort of ok although I did get help with the dryer from a young Polish lad who just wanted to make his breakfast and get away from me…not sure I even used the correct soap stuff,it didn’t seem thick enough but when I’ve been very poor on the dole I have used washing up liquid to hand wash some clothes so I’m sure whatever this is will be fine.The clothes smelt ok when I took them out…

On that happy sweet smelling note see ya later…

Flat plains drifter…Germany #13

So here we are…after getting into the mighty Berlin hbf,buying a weekly ticket on my phone and having a smoke( if you smoke don’t go to either of the main exits,there are two side areas up on the 4th floor where all the workers go.You get no hassle) I got the u-Bahn to Pankow where I’m staying…

I was sure the place would be a piece of piss to find but I made the mistake of going to the S-Bahn station and then coming out of the wrong exit,unfortunately there’s a huge duel carriage way in the middle with no way across except climbing innumerable stairs( Berlin and stairs.More later) by which time it was blistering hot,I was sweating like Nigel Farage having to talk to his constituents and I still didn’t have a scooby where the hotel was.Plus my legs & feet were aching…

Eventually found the place after strolling past it twice ( I was frazzled) and of course couldn’t get in.Was calling a number when a nice lady opened the door to me “ I only speak Deutsch & Spanish,no English” we got by though,we always get by…of course the room’s on the top floor and no lift and also as far away from urban life as possible…Jesus what have I come to I thought…

No worries.Cleaned up and headed out to see what’s what.Went in the opposite direction to where I came in,pub at the end of the street,promising,I had no cash,she doesn’t take cards.Is there an atm close? She shrugs…I hadn’t noticed there’s a tram stop opposite the bar,gave her the Arnie “ I’ll be back “ and jumped on in search of civilisation,or at least an atm.Five stops later I found a dodgy one in a kebab shop and caught the tram back.Meanwhile a truely magnificent storm had broken out.One of those the Russians send over occasionally as if to say “see what you get?” 

The landlady greeted me like a returning war hero and even said I could sit out the storm and sit inside smoking but I feel it’s my duty to sit it out under a leaky cover…

So from a very iffy start I’m hopefully getting into the swing of Berlin again no matter where the hell I am…I’m doing my British thing of making a good job of an unpromising situation…

Have also noticed over the road a huge bikers bar( well more of a clubhouse really) with “ All welcome “ on the front.I’m gonna take that with a large pinch of salt I think.They may be genuine but I’m not taking chances…

I think in the morning I might see if I can mess up the washing machine…oh yea and my room is huge but with very little in it save a bed,table & chair.Very odd.At least I have a bathroom…

Certainly I’m in a better frame of mind than I was four hours ago.Anazing what a difference finding a local bar and a good transport link can make to one’s situation isn’t it? 

I am easily pleased…and I also met a fellow Yamyam…

Flat plains drifter…Germany #12

Got my coffee and waiting on the platform at Lübeck station for a train to Hamburg then onto Berlin.Had to let the previous train go as my pass said there was a bus replacement so not a hope in hell I’m getting involved in that if I can avoid it…also the change between trains was five minutes so decided to get a later one where you don’t need to be Usain Bolt to catch the damn thing…I don’t mind hanging around,sort of used to it by now…

Even though I have been to Berlin on many occasions this time will be my first staying in the former Soviet section.I will be in Pankow which i don’t recall ever going to before.I only know the name because it’s the final stop on a U-Bahn line.It’s the red line so if you know your London Tube Pankow is probably Berlin‘s version of Theydon Bois.Or perhaps not…

All this train lark must be making me jaded.This train is a double decker and I have chosen to go downstairs.Also all the seats are reserved but as it’s basically a commuter train from Lübeck to Hamburg ( about 50 miles) I think they just haven’t bothered to turn the signs off,at least I hope that’s the case…

On the train to Berlin from Hamburg,it’s a few minutes late but no big hurry today.It’s a long old journey as it’s going from north to east and then south to Bavaria.I was a wee bit concerned about not booking a seat but grabbed one and as Berlin is the first stop all looks good.The seat is “ Vorrangplatz” meaning a priority seat.Don’t know what it means but assume it’s like our buses and it’s for moaning old bastards like me.Next stop the madness that is Berlin HBF…anyway it’s about 180 miles away and takes about the same time as London to Brum( no stops helps)When DB get it right it’s usually pretty damn good…

In both Bremen & Lübeck I did‘nt bother buying any local transport tickets,not because I’m a bad boy but because I walked everywhere but Berlin is different.The transport system will be in constant use…I’m there from today (7th) until the 12th and you‘d think buying a daily pass would be cheaper than a weekly,however despite losing out on two days usage buying a weekly one works out over €6 cheaper.If I was there a week it would be €26 cheaper.Worth considering if you’re going to Berlin for four days plus…

Phew! A lesson in not getting too cocky.Thought I had sussed everything out about where this place was but went to wrong way out of the station and ended up miles away! Eventuality retraced my steps and after much sweating & swearing I have found it…bloody hell it’s out of the way but they do have a washing machine so things are not all bad…

Once I have stopped sweating I will check out the local area which from my point of view looks like nothing more than scrubland…

Laters…

Next in MAGAland…#USA

These are Stolpersteine or Stumbling Stones in English.They’re found all over mainland Europe,indeed anywhere the Nazis had invaded…

They’re the work of artists Gunter Damnzig and they’re to be found on any given street in any European city from the Mediterranean to the Baltic,from the Atlantic coast to the Ural mountains…why you might ask? 

These brass plaque embedded into the street outside seemingly random buildings are the records of those deemed enemies of the Nazi regime,mostly Jewish but not exclusively so,who were forcibly evicted from their homes,deported to death camps where many perished and also, to add  cruel & barbaric insult to cruel and barbaric injury, their homes were then taken over by locals deemed loyal to the regime no doubt after the same loyal citizens had disowned them to the relevant authorities…these Stolpersteine are the visible record on the streets of such inhumanity…

Think such barbarism couldn’t happen in the USA? Well you’re already on the way with your own citizens being deported to god know‘s where and to god know‘s what conditions.They may not be recognised as “ death “ camps but the letter’s in the post.If the Republican Party are happy to cut medical aid to millions of those it deems loyal supporters how much care will be taken to those locked up as enemies of the state? 

As for redistribution of property from deported disloyal individuals/families to those loyal to Trump,Miller,Bannon et al it’s only a matter of time and sadly there are many of your own neighbours and possibly friends and family who are only too happy,willing and able to be party to such barbarity…to put it bluntly much as there were millions upon millions of German/European Nazis willing to throw their friends & family into the waiting ovens so there’s the same in the USA…

The only light at the end of the tunnel I can see is that the resistance is bigger and possibly better organised but courage is needed as those in power will attempt to hold on to that power with all they have and distressingly the logical outcome would seem to be open warfare against it’s own citizens…

Best of luck decent Americans.I think you will need it otherwise in thirty years time another artist will be laying Stolpersteines into your streets…

Flat plains drifter…Germany #11

The good news after today’s hotel shenanigans is I and my bags are still in the  room and as an added apology they left me a little bag of sweets on the door handle…now I’m going to see if Dart’s Corner is open…

So anyway the Dart’s Corner was open and true to it’s word it’s on a corner and caters for darts players.For quite a while it was just me and the barman in there having a chat.He had the look of a younger slightly less cadaverous Paul Weller and he didn’t have a  scooby how to pour a draught beer.I felt like saying “ come on Paul you know this,tilt the fucking glass” but alas he just stood there glass up and let it pour in…later on some dart types came in but alas their darting was as piss poor as Paul’s beer management…but it was open so there’s that.

Last day in Lübeck and we have rain and it’s also Sunday,a German Sunday is always a treat…one thing I like about this area is there are plenty of sites within the city that are covered in wildflowers to encourage the bees.It would be easy to manicure all the greenery like a golf course but gladly they haven’t.Save the planet an‘ all that,or at least what we can before the whiny little bitch Trump destroys it all because of his daddy issues…

Have to go for a shower after writing that name down.I feel sullied…

Oddly Lübeck is one place I have not been asked for a cigarette or money whilst sitting outside a cafe bar and I have been outside a lot! It’s a pretty normal thing.I have seen plenty of shouty drunk chaps walking around but none have stopped me.I fully expect that to change once in Berlin,it’s almost a right of passage.I can’t recall ever being harrassed by it.If I give then fine and if not the response is normally a shrug and move on.Time,after all,is money,or a smoke…

Took a stroll to the Hauptbahnhof earlier and my heart sank a bit as there was a sign about disruption between Hamburg( where I change) and Berlin but luckily it’s not starting until Aug 1st…they’re going to take years sorting out the infrastructure of the railways to get it up to a decent standard again I’m afraid…hopefully on a personal note this trip won’t be too badly affected…

Anyway Berlin tomorrow for five days.Seems ages since I was last there yet it’s only been about two months! Long time readers will already know it’s my favourite city on earth so needless to say I’m looking forward to it…I also know barstaff who can pour a draught beer…

Tschüss…

Flat plains drifter…Germany #10

Not wanting a strong beer the landlady suggest something “mid strength” And bought me a Staropramen.Not sure what they count as strong in these parts but I’m staying clear…

Walked back to the hotel to changed into trousers and met the cleaning lady I had seen yesterday.We communicated in very broken German/English but I think she both apologised ( no need) and then asked when I was leaving! A sort of “ lovely to see you,now fuck off” Of course it is now the hottest part of the day…

All of the bars & cafes I have been to have wild flowers on the tables outside which attract bumble bees.An excellent thing as we need more bees doing their thing…

More Lübeck trivia to get you excited.It’s famous for Thomas Mann,Willy Brandt and Gunter Grass and also it’s the marzipan capital of Germany.Something I can happily do without as i detest the stuff…

When I said earlier there was nothing around where I was staying it turns out I was wrong as there’s a bar called Dart‘s Corner just on the,er,corner.I had passed it a couple of times without sussing out what it was and it was only checking Google maps out for local bars I saw it.Doesn’t open till 6pm so maybe that’s why it evaded scrutiny.Will check it out later.The area appears to be ok so not expecting an “estate” type vibe when strolling in.At least I hope not…

Life can be weird sometimes.The current bar I’m in and the landlady with a strong German accent says “ where are you from?” To make things less complicated I always say “ London” in these situations.She says “ no where are you really from?” I tell her and begin to explain where Wolverhampton is but she tells me she knows exactly where it is as she lived in Birmingham for several years…bravo German landlady.

Just had this little fella for company.Red squirrels are pretty common in mainland Europe but rare in the British Isles so it was a pleasure…

The local bar was a bust,certainly wasn’t open at 6pm as google maps claimed.Not sure if it’s an ongoing thing at all.Ah well…

Talking of maps I had a gander at an old GDR map last night and hadn’t realised Lübeck was on the border.I suppose as it was called East Germany I assumed it didn’t come this far west.You live and learn apparently…must have been difficult to police as there are so many different waterways leading from east to west in these parts…

Still no laundry day needed but it’s getting close.Think I can last until Berlin in two days and then it’s gonna have to be an absolute must.Think I might eventually be learning how to pack properly to lessen the amount of time I need to watch my smalls swirling around a washing machine.With time comes wisdom…

Message from hotel owner about vacating the room today otherwise he will have to get the Polizei involved! Wondering what the hell was going on I messaged “ wait there I will be ten minutes “ got back and it turns out he had me down as leaving today whereas I’m there until July 7th and luckily still have the booking in my phone.Bloody hell that’s a heart stopper…he’s assured me all’s ok now and I’m good but in all honesty I just want to piss off now as I’m wondering about what else he has in store.He seems ok but maybe this line of business isn’t for him…shame as it’s an ok city but…I suppose if everything ran perfectly life would be dull…

Until tomorrow where I might be out in the streets…however I do still have the keys so that’s a good sign.

Flat plains drifter…Germany #9

Well you could say my stay in Lübeck is off to a rocky start…at the moment I’m sitting at a bus stop next to the hotel opposite a nursery school with my bags( which looks as dodgy as hell!) 

Got to the city fine and walked from the Hauptbahnhof which is never as far as it appears on google maps,as I got to the guest house two ladies were leaving and said “no no full!” I tried to explain I had booked but they insisted and the one called the manager and reiterated “ no,full” then they drove off…I decided to call myself,got a garbled reply then the phone went dead but I got a message asking my name,told them and luckily got a thumbs up response…phew.

Now I’m just waiting for him to turn up before the Polizei do to start asking me probing questions…got a phone call from him giving me directions to open the key press,finally I can get in…nope,the key press is empty.Meanwhile a fella comes in,rings the fella and gets his key immediately.They obviously spoke about me( he was German) and said his wife was coming with the key for me but then he rang saying to try another key press and bingo there were keys.Oh and then his wife turned up with the keys to the original room!

Anyway I have found a bar…

Not seen much of Lübeck yet.What I have seen looks old & historic but will check it out more tomorrow.What with the travelling,messing about with keys and still trying to process the senseless untimely death of a recent Wolves here Diogo Jota it’s been a pig of a day.Heading back to the hotel soon for an early night…

Anyway had a good night‘s kip and a quick reccy on what’s close by,as we established there’s a nursery & a bus stop and that’s about it.The area is very residential but only a ten minute walk from the city centre so no problem…not gonna bother mentioning last night’s shenanigans if I do a review of the place( sometimes I write one) from what I gather it’s a new venture and they don’t need negativity over something that was solved fairly easily etc shit happens blah blah blah…

Lübeck is an Island City.The fairly big city is enclosed entirely by water( just Incase you were struggling with the concept of what an island is) and that very thing makes it as medieval as hell…they do love a double church tower here,seems to be loads of them…

Obviously it was bombed extensively during the war but mostly it‘s been lovingly restored to what I can imagine is it’s former glory,even to the extent of building a whole new TK Maxx from scratch…

Managed to find the craft shop,independent cafe arty farty area of Lübeck.Usually I decry these parts of towns but in reality I feel quite at home in these areas.The beard & growing hair give me the aura of the struggling artist I feel…I have noticed on strolling around that about half the people approximately my age are either in wheelchairs or using walking aids.For once I feel pretty healthy even if it’s  only by default…

Did that thing of looking out the window,seeing clear blue skies and thought “ well that’s shorts & t- shirt weather “ without thinking I’m next to the Baltic Sea which is practically Scandinavia just one stop from the bloody North Pole…it’s not freezing by any stretch but neither is it shorts & t-shirt weather…

That’s about it for today lads & lasses.Laters all…

Flat plains drifter…Germany #8

And then came the storm…

Rarely does an oppressive spell of hot weather just fizzle out.The weather gods like to produce a “Ta Da!” moment for us mere mortals to remind us who’s boss…once I got out of the Irish bar,after having a wonderfully filling shepherds pie,the black clouds had rolled in,the wind had picked up and a storm was brewing.Luckily the tram came quickly and not only that but at my stop the door opened right next to my hotel entrance,which is probably the coolest thing that’s ever happened in the world ever…the thunder & lightning came just as I drew the curtains in the room.No idea how hard it rained but today is nice and brisk…

As expected all the trains on the network are running late again.I have a short trip to Hamburg followed by another one to Lübeck.That being the case I’m getting an earlier train than expected to Hamburg to offset the problem,on a double decker no less,hopefully will still get to Lübeck the same time as usual.One of the joys of interrail tickets is the ability to change the ticket when boarding a train…

Just this instance heard about Diogo Jota being killed in a car crash.What terrible news…

Sorry all but I think I will just publish this as is.Feels wrong to carry on being all jokey in light of the news about former Wolves star Diogo Jota.Just married with three young kids.Tragic…

Hope you all understand.

Flat plains drifter…Germany #7.5

Needless to say the laundromat didn’t get a visit.I think we can put it down to a combination of laziness and not being needy enough for cleaning clothes yet.No doubt will wait until I have no choice…

As I sit here writing this there is a devil woman shouting at everyone & everything within screeching distance.Am keeping a close eye to check she doesn’t head my way…maybe the sun has got to her but I fear her problems are much more fundamental…

Talking of weather it’s hot hot hot yet again but as most of Europe is in the grip of it there’s no point whinging as we’re all in the same boat.I feel sorry for the people of Paris where it close to 40c and heaven knows what the Metro is like,ditto the Tube in London.Been there,done it etc and never want to do it again in this heat…those poor buggers having to go to work in this!

Last full day in Bremen today before heading off to Lübeck on the Baltic coast tomorrow in what should be a straightforward shortish journey with one change at Hamburg.But we all know the vagaries of trains in this part of the world by now…

The devil woman is still screeching like a banshee but luckily others are getting it and not me…yet.

Not been to Lübeck before,looks a fascinating place.The granddaddy of the Hanseatic League ( probably the greatest…blah blah blah) once held all the power in this region and I believe the architecture might convey that power.We will see…

Looking over to the woman it appears she has a couple of carers with her,no doubt to prevent anything escalating as she screams at all and sundry.My guess an extreme case of Tourette’s and now I feel guilty…

Bit the bullet and bought a day transport ticket from a street machine.I‘m walked out,especially as I will probably be in the bar most of the day.My only worry with these things is do I need to validate the ticket? In some city‘s you do but not others.Can’t see a validation machine anywhere either on the street or on the tram and as the ticket is time stamped I think I’m ok.It’s a bloody minefield…

Whilst waiting for the tram there was a demo by local taxis.They were driving around the city in convoy.No idea what it was about,probably something important or it could be they’re sick of driving Mercedes Benz and wanted to knock around in Austin Allegros…

Had totally forgotten about the cricket being on.Doubt if I can get to watch any here.There’s an Irish bar over the road but it’s not open yet and there’s no guarantee they’ll show anything for one bloke anyway.Die Fliege is a “ sports” bar but wouldn’t even entertain a fella wanting to watch Dortmund last night so I think my chances are slim to none getting them to put this weird sport on…I once managed to get England v Windies on in a Prague bar but only because the landlord was Pakistani and wanted to watch it as much as I did.Stayed there over six hours…

As I had finished today’s blog earlier I’m gonna knock this one out today too.Call it a Brucie Bonus if you want or cruel & unusual punishment.I’ll let you decide which…

Flat plains drifter…Germany #7

Just this minute booked up for three nights in Magdeburg.Not a place I have been before but I know it’s an historic city.I have stayed in former GDR cities before but they’ve all been close to the Polish border so really east East Germany whereas Magdeburg is much more central.It will be interesting to see the difference in architecture etc…so that’s after Lübeck( first time there too) and naturally Berlin,always gotta go to Berlin on one of these trips.Traditional innit…after I still have three stops to pick.One will no doubt be Düsseldorf as I know it well and can discuss English football with the barman in my “local” then possibly Aachen on the German/ Belgium border.Been through it loads of times and it looks an interesting city and finally I need to get back to Amsterdam for my Eurostar train so could stay there or possibly somewhere like Groningen.Decisions decisions…

Am back in Viertel ( not sure if it’s not called Das Viertel) primarily to keep out of the sun but also as I like the bar I use…this area in Bremen reminds me very much of St Pauli in Hamburg and Kreuzberg in Berlin,a bit shabby a bit lefty and with an alternative lifestyle.Needless to say they’re my three favourite areas in this country…

Viertel is basically a mile long drag on the edge of the city with that classic European look of late 19th century buildings either side of a cobbled road with trams thundering up and down.Lots of independent shops coupled with bars & cafes along the route.The side streets are littered with houses that have seen better days but also plenty of greenery to offset the somewhat decrepit look…also Werder Bremen’s ground is about a further half mile up the road…

I can imagine the locals are fiercely proud of their area and no doubt inwardly smile at it’s reputation knowing deep down it’s exaggerated but doing nothing to discredit the myth…

I don’t know if this is a thing or not but three times now,twice in the Netherlands and once here in Bremen ,I have asked for an Americano in a cafe to be asked “you mean a black coffee?” Never had this before.Is it a sort of anti US thing or am I seeing too much into it? Besides I always assumed an “ Americano” was more of a Latino thing or is that maybe being too nuanced? Trouble is whenever I have asked for black coffee before on previous trips I have been met with blank stares…perplexed.I hope it’s just my imagination as I don’t want to think of us Europeans as so petty minded ( Freedom Fries anyone?)

One thing for any first timer to Bremen is the transport app seems almost impossible to download and register for,I wondered why I didn’t already have it on my phone as I have every other one I have ever used .All’s fine until you get to date of birth and they just give you -/-/- to put 6/8 digits in.I have tried several different ways to work it but no dice.I must be doing something wrong as they wouldn’t be so stupid to make it so difficult surely.Luckily it’s a very walkable city so no real problems but still…

Table service; This is something I have discussed with my mate Pete ( hi Pete) and we are both in agreement that it’s much better than the counter scrum we have in the UK to get a drink.Many in the UK prefer our system citing waiting times as a downside conveniently forgetting the times they’ve been six deep at the bar waiting half hour to get served…and then have to carry the beers back through the throng behind them hopefully unscathed.It seems more civilised to wait at the table and get beers bought to you then pay up at the end of the night…I have had three beers here and haven’t moved a muscle,now if the waitress can wheel me to the toilet too that would be swell…also as an added bonus she’s spotted when I was down to one mouthful,gave me a thumbs up and got me a fresh drink before I could blink.What’s not to love?

Ok peeps it‘s still 1st July but will post this tomorrow sometime.Popped back into Die Flige and it’s actually cool.They have the ceiling fan working overtime.The landlady asked me if I wanted an ashtray with my beer! Haha

Think I might do laundry in the morning.I‘m not desperate but I know where it is as I’ve been there before so might aswell as the hot weather is kicking in…talking of which I’m glad to still have some anti mosquito spray with me.Them little fuckers could be gearing up for a mad summer…

The landlady just stormed out leaving the bar empty.I wondered what the hell was going on,turns out she’d gone over the road to order a Döner Kebab.German landladies are a law unto themselves…

Flat plains drifter…Germany #6

Sitting in a Bremen bar with good beer listening to some dub from the likes of Triston Palma,Jah Shaker & Jacob Miller ( yea I Shazammed.Don’t @ me) makes me realise why I do this fucking around various parts of Europe annually…relaxing good vibes that make me at ease with myself.If I had done this years ago whilst still young the compulsion to party party party would have been overwhelming,probably to the detriment of anything I was hoping to achieve by putting too much pressure on myself to have a “ good time” ie drink till 3/4am everyday in the pursuit of god knows what.Luckily the older one gets the more the body says “ are you fucking kidding me pal?” 

Some might find it odd that I do this on my own and have done for a while but the plain simple truth is it’s better this way for both myself & everyone I know.Over the years I haven’t lost many friends and that’s mostly by us giving each other space.I know myself well enough to know that a month or two travelling around Europe with me would be a death knell for any friendship.With age comes the realisation that I can be a twat to be around for any length of time and so can most everyone else…I have to admit writing these blogs helps too.I like to be a bit jokey & irreverent mostly but occasionally it’s good to get serious thoughts down on paper,or whatever this is…

Anyway that’s enough of that nonsense…a dyslexic walks into a bra…

Anyhoo.A couple of things to remember being a Brit conversing with a German is that they can be very literal.So if for instance you do the Brit thing of saying “ you alright?” Which in the UK means “hello” we don’t expect an answer save from “ yea,you?” What we don’t expect is honesty,ie “ no,Infact my life is falling apart,the wife left me,I am being sacked from work and the council have changed the day the recycling bin goes out” However in the unlikely scenario where that does happen then us blokes spend about a minute discussing said problems then go to the pub and talk football for five hours…many Germans will see “ you alright?” as an invitation to unload their myriad worries in your direction…

Also we leave someone’s company it’s customary to say something like “ see you soon” or “ see you later” of course in the UK this means there’s a 25% chance we will meet again in the next six months depending on if I can cross the road in time to avoid you or not.However in Germany after this diary’s might come out and cross references made for availability on any given times & days…you have been warned.It’s a jungle out there…

I have noticed a fair few youth wearing the shirt of the local football team Werder Bremen,which is a good thing and to be expected in a one team city,a fairly sizeable team at that.On the flip side I’ve also seen lots of Real Madrid tops being worn too.I suppose that’s a result of our game becoming more global…

My hotel does that thing about hanging a sign outside the door if the room doesn’t need a clean.It’s a good thing as it shouldn’t need seeing to after one night.The sign usually includes some guff about saving the planet too whereas Infact you’re helping to ease already stressed cleaners by giving them less work…the one in this hotel is a little bag and you get a voucher to take to reception for either a snack or a bottle of water.Very nice and a free bottle of water in this weather is very handy…

Ok then,gonna take a stroll by the river Weser which will eventually take me to Werder Bremen’s ground.It’s a lovely day for a river walk…I take it back.It would be a day for a lovely walk if there was shade,there’s not.Myself and direct sunlight really don’t belong in each other’s company.Lord knows how people lay out in the sun eight hours a day.It’s beyond my ken,Ken…

Ah well happy July 1st and laters all…