60 Days in Europe…#33 Paris…

In the same jazzy cafe bar I was in last night having early morning coffee.As can be imagined it was rammed last night for the French game.I fully expected it to empty out soon after but if anything the placed filled up even more…the clientele was mostly the young,hip & sexy of Menilmontant and I have to admit I felt a bit out of place.I wasn’t made to feel that way it was just my own insecurity poking through…indeed had a good chat with a couple of blokes in their mid 40’s…needless to say I will remain coming here.Blonde Biere at €3-50? What’s not to like? 

Managed to find one clean t-shirt,socks & pants at the bottom of my bag so the laundry is now waiting until tomorrow.Luckily it’s a cool overcast day too! Also getting low on deodorant so shopping is also on the menu.They have a market day opposite where I am and passed a few stalls that have big bottles of designer cologne for €5.Might give that a miss.Like I said definitely Hackney like…there’s also plenty of police sirens doing the rounds to reinforce the Hackney vibes…

Jumped on the metro without much of an idea where to go and ended up getting off at Les Halles and that’s one muthaflipping huge metro station…somehow found my way to Westfield shopping centre but didn’t want to buy any Lego and thankfully there isn’t a West Ham ground attached to this one…had a walk outside and I’m close to the Pompidou Centre with all the art and stuff.Grabbed a chicken curry baguette which frankly looked a lot better than it tasted,although it was as messy as you can imagine.The beard took some hammer…currently in a fancy(ish) restaurant round the back of Hotel de Ville having an expensive lager & an even more expensive cheesecake.Which was magnificent…

Toiletries bought.You know the hoary old cliche about the French being a bit smelly well the cheapest roll on deodorant was €5 and frankly I’d happily smell like Worzel Gummidge after a strenuous roll in the hay with Aunt Sally at those prices…

Sometimes when you’re feeling smug it quickly comes back to bite you on your arse.Was having a bit of a smug moment earlier when bragging about the beer being €3-50.Just sat down in an unremarkable place called Le Bastille,ordered a Kronenburg and it’s €11-50! ( that is not a typo by the way) This is pre Olympics price too.Thank god this place isn’t my local!

Suddenly gone humid,big grey clouds above.I think I know what’s coming…right on cue.Luckily I’m under cover having a cheap drink…

Yesterday got my reservation ticket to Strasbourg for Saturday.Now it’s on a slow train and was dirt cheap so of course I was in but didn’t really check it properly till later and it turns out the train isn’t on my Interrail app.Went back to Gare L’est today and the lady assured me it would be fine but seemed befuddled as to what was going on…not what to do yet.Might just change my train altogether or just risk it…at this rate I’ll be getting flashbacks like a Vietnam Vet…

Now Wednesday morning and finally made it to the laundrette.It’s called The Speed Queen which I think was The Who’s follow up to Quadraphenia…anyway it’s much needed.A fella in here helped me out but in truth I would have worked it all out if I were here on my own.Strangely I still feel intimidated if other people are here and it’s obvious I don’t have a Scooby what I’m doing…at least having a cafe next door means I can have a coffee while the deed is done.Four of us in here all having a good old Smokey cough!

Later on I’m going to Pere Lachaise,the large cemetery where Jim Morrison is buried,amongst others of course,it’s only one stop up from here too.I am reliably informed by my mate Phil,who knows of these things,that it’s the anniversary of Morrison’s death and that there’s normally a gathering of some sort there so we will see…

In a while crocodile…

60 Days in Europe…#32 Paris…

Sitting outside a small cafe barely 50 yards from the hotel.Already made the proprietor guffaw with my laughable French so this is my coffee stop and an added bonus is the Metro is right in front of me…it’s 9am and I’m watching Parisians going to work.Life is good again…

Got a few things to sort out today not least of which is my seat reservation for Strasbourg in six days( not getting caught out like that again) If Interrail could get together with the French rail companies so one can order these things from outside France it would solve a lot of problems…anyway in future will just have to box clever.

One of my personal rules was to take as few taxis as possible on these trips & use plenty of public transport.On this trip I have had to break that several times however.I think part of my reticence was the fear of being ripped off,we have all heard the horror stories over the years but I have to say everyone I have used has been great.No problem whatsoever.But you still need to be careful and only get licensed cabs…last night at Gare du Lyon to get to the taxi rank proper you literally have to walk through about a dozen shysters offering “taxi” service.Ignore them,they’re not allowed on the official rank…the cab I got was a fair price.Only about €12 for a 3 mile trip after midnight…

I have now located the local laundromat,again not more than 30 seconds walk from the hotel next to a pretty cool,typical Paris jazz cafe…I think Menilmontant has just become my go to place to stay in this city…seems a cool area and this jazz cafe might become my second “ local” here…

After a stroll around some parts of Menilmontant (district 20) I get a Hackney vibe and that’s always my go to criteria about if I like a place.The more Hackney the more I like and it’s very Hackney( I would hazard a big guess it’s not a Le Pen voting area).Had a bit of a kerfuffle getting a metro ticket earlier and the fella behind the counter had to incorporate a translation device,then my sort of Oyster card ( but not quite) wouldn’t work so he let me through and as yet still don’t know if it’s gonna work later.The tension…still saw people jumping the barriers right in front of clerk’s office though.He sensibly ignored it.Not worth his trouble… 

As I was up Gare du Nord way I popped into a cafe I have used a few times and was refused just having a beer which has never happened before.Was going to say “ no wonder you’re empty with that attitude “ then remembered I was in Paris…so having a bevvy elsewhere.Didn’t have one yesterday and on reflection that’s probably a good thing…

I had forgotten how wonderfully mad Paris metro stations are compared to others I have been to.There’s walkways everywhere and some seem to go on for ever like it’s a Parisian practical joke on tourists or something.I’m sure it all makes sense to those using it but not to the rest of us.I would hate to be in a rush and try to negotiate my way around them…

If you’ve never lasciviously rubbed your ample stomach after cheeseburger,chips & a pint of lager in an American themed restaurant on Place de la Republique saying “ that filled a hole” to the very sexy and bemused French waitress can you even call yourself British?  I didn’t of course but damn the cheeseburger was ace…

Lots of police vans going past,maybe a dozen,then realised France are playing in an hour and half…might make my way back to Menilmontant to see if I can find a bar showing it.They have it on here but I’d rather go more “local”…The jazz bar is showing it and my oyster(non oyster) card worked so I guess that makes me a fully paid up Parisian…

Interesting chat with a couple of fellas named Mark & Kevin.Locals,Started with football talk naturally but quickly moved onto the elections in both countries.Luckily we were all on the same page politically…both were of the opinion that Le Pen will win and they’re probably right( they weren’t happy about it)

In a while crocodile…

60 Days in Europe…#31 Paris…

This might well be a blow by blow account of my long train journey from Genoa to Paris.If it is sorry in advance…

Got to the station for the 5-22 train which doesn’t exist so the next one is at 6-07,which I’m sitting on now waiting to depart.A few chatty workmen & women dotted about for the docks down the line.Already had a couple of people scrounging a smoke and a couple of lads wanting to know where to buy tickets…itching for a coffee I tried the platform vending machine.Normally vending machine coffee is pretty rank but this was fine,or would have been if I hadn’t misjudged the sugar and put way too much in.At least I got a bit of a sugar rush at 5-30am…

Looked at the train times and got time for a proper coffee in Ventimiglia,then it’s just over an hour to Nice ,hopefully get a reservation seat ticket for the Paris leg(doubtful) and get into Gare du Lyon about 6pm.Luckily my hotel is in Menilmontant which is pretty close…

Nothing of note on the Genoa to Ventimiglia route.Stopped off everywhere,in the early part it was clubbers who’d been out to neighbourhood costal towns.Badly dressed boy gangsters and their barely dressed girlfriends…later on it was regular Joe Public…

It’s a nice run though along the coast from Genoa towards France.In general it sticks to the coast,at times being only feet away from the sea.You pass through plenty of heavily industrial areas which as you know warms my jets and then it’s the seaside towns,some posh,you know where locals wear their sailing club sweatshirts like capes,and some not so posh,where locals don’t have sailing club sweatshirts but if they did they’d wear them normally like normal people…if you do have a sweatshirt you may want to wear on the train as they crank up the air conditioning…

First thing I come across at Ventimiglia station is a 45yr old fella(ish) shouting out rap lyrics.There was a lot of “muthaflippers” going down…cafe over the road is still open thankfully…Like all border towns Ventimiglia has a slight identity crisis.It’s still obviously Italian but the cafe is mainlining brioche…sat on the train now waiting for the off,could have got an earlier one but that was only 5 mins after pulling in and I have no mind to be rushed…it’s a double decker too.

When on the train you know you’ve passed the French border as there’s a certain je ne sais quoi,a certain oh la la,a certain…nah EE told me,and about all the great roaming charges…

Welcome to Nice! And you’re welcome  to Nice.Last year it was my nemesis and this year it’s my nemesis +.So my nemesissisisis…thought I would rock up and take the fine on the train but they’ve changed the rules( The French and their silly little rules eh?)you now can’t even get on without a reservation.Asked the woman where I could get one.The shop at the end of the concourse but it doesn’t open till 12-15 she said with a smile.I was trying to get on the 12-03…ok try to keep cool.Only two “For fuck’s sakes” left my lips.There’s always the next train via Marseille in just over an hour…

Still with me? Went to get the ticket,that train is full.No can do.There’s one seat left on the last train that gets into Gare du Lyon at just past 11pm.No choice but to accept.The train means a change at Marseille,another change at Lyon then hopefully into Paris…oh and check in closes at 11pm.(have messaged the hotel,no response yet) So my long 11 hour trip has now been extended by 6 hours with no guarantee of a bed for tonight…thanks Nice,oh and thanks for making me €20 lighter.So far…

But you know it’s all part of the game,as I was coming out of getting my ticket I passed a young lass in a wheelchair breathing through a pipe and just thought “perspective Gareth,perspective “

However two valuable lessons learnt.1) avoid Nice like the plague as a changeover station.It really is horrible and not suitable for the traffic it gets..I will keep away from now on.2) Nah that’s it…

Anyway enough moaning.I wanted adventure even if it’s controlled toa large degree,should know by now things don’t always go as planned and occasionally embrace the chaos…if I don’t get a reply from the hotel I’ll turn up and see then if I can’t get in I’ll play it by ear…so for now I’m sitting on this packed train to Marseille losing myself in a bit of Ren’s music trying not to think…

Part 2 tomorrow.And the laundry? Yea that can wait…

In a while crocodile…

Good news is the hotel has replied and they will be open.Didn’t really wanna be down & out in Paris despite my previous bravado…

Not finished yet,train to Lyon was late so missed my connecting train to Paris and had to find the ticket office which is hard to locate in Lyon.Not an easy station to navigate.Managed to find it and now on train to Paris.It’s just after 10pm and I should have been there at 6…I’ll be honest this has totally disheartened me and I will probably give the blog a miss for a couple of days to get my head straight so if you don’t hear from me don’t worry…apart from all the dicking around with the trains( I mean it would have been 18 hours + by the time I get my head down) it also means I have missed half a day checking out the local area of Paris where I’m staying…

Sorry for being so down,I normally like to throw in a few jokes here and there but tonight I’m really not in the mood.I can’t fake it,you lot would suss that straight away.

Anyway this is definitely goodnight and I’m sure I’ll be fine once I’ve processed what today has been about…

Hello again! It’s now morning.I have had a sleep and looked at my ramblings ,especially the last bits and debated with myself about deleting anything and decided I won’t.That was how I was feeling at that particular time…the head’s in a far better place now.

60 Days in Europe…#30 Genoa—Paris

So things started off interesting today and very nearly became both interesting and complicated…first off had coffee in the station.It’s a bustling place at the top of a hill( this is Genoa,everything is at the top of a hill) There’s a long road down to the port side filled with hotels etc and loads of tourists.Halfway down it’s all blocked off by police with tape,ambulances,the works.Think they found a body this morning( just seen it was a suspicious device found in a church )so all of us are being directed down the mini alleyways that are even more forbidding than the main ones.These having far few commercial ventures and consequently are much dirtier & sleazy than the main drag that attracts tourists.Nobody ever ventures this way! I grabbed a seat midway and watched the look of bemused horror on the faces of luggage wielding tourists wondering what the hell they’d let themselves in for.All good fun…

Then later I decided to communicate with the landlord of the place I’m staying in to say thanks and let him know my leaving plans for tomorrow…the trouble is we are communicating via Google translate on our phones having not seen each other since I got here.Now Google translate is fine but probably not 100% and I suddenly started getting messages ending with lots of !!!??? and I knew something was up.After a few frantic to & fros it turned out he thought I was leaving today not tomorrow and wanted to know why he couldn’t find the keys etc in the end he realised the cock up,was very apologetic and called me a wonderful guest & a gentleman.Not a good judge of character clearly…have to admit I was getting worried though! Serves me right for laughing at the poor scared looking buggers earlier…

When I went into a slight morality lecture yesterday it was particularly inspired by sitting in the station cafe outside area that morning.I use it everyday and it’s where the police,military (there’s always a few around) and train staff hang out and it serves good cheap coffee too…it was pretty full and a loud American family were tearing into what a shithole and how boring Genoa was.Now have that opinion if you want even though you’re wrong & stupid but understand that even though English is not wildly spoken many police,military & train staff understand it perfectly and will take umbrage at their city being loudly condemned in their presence by oafish tourists.I noticed they were getting a good few side eye glances from many there.I was very tempted to chime in but bit my lip but it stayed with me all day…

Early train tomorrow.By early I’m talking 5-20am.I know right! Partly the reason I chose to stay right by the station was to accommodate this trip.I did the same last year but only as far as Lyon,this time it’s three hours longer at about 11 hours.Yikes! The early train will be chock full of workers going to the docks then it’s about a three hour trip along the Mediterranean coast (arguably better than the Cinque Terre route) to Ventimiglia,where luckily I know there’s a good cafe over from the station.Hope it’s still open,then along the coast to Nice,a place I had a bad time in last year but hopefully things are better this time around.finally a five hour train to Paris…I could have gone another route via Turin & Zurich but it’s the same length and they wanted reservations for each leg which would have come to about €70 and I think we can all agree that can fuck off.I’ll take my chances with a fine on the Nice to Paris leg…

However I am in a quandary.Italy play Switzerland in a few hours and I feel it’s now my patriotic duty to watch the game down by the docks.No worries,even with extra time,penalties & the stupidity of VAR the game should be over by 8pm but, but, oh man there’s another game on later and I know me.The temptation to stay will be pulling at me even though I have that thing tomorrow.We will see.I might be disciplined…

Well for once I was disciplined! Now in the cafe bar at the bottom of the hill( which is back open) which seems to have two waitresses that work about 18 hours a day.Anyway game was rubbish from an Italian point of view but the Swiss were great.Surprised that none of the watching punters seemed too bothered about the display & result.There was a weary acceptance of it all…

Finish this drink then off to bed I hope.Will find out if I have a bed to sleep in when I get up the hill…

Laters alligators…

60 Days in Europe…#29 Genoa…

Some of you are no doubt thinking “he’s not mentioned laundry for a while.I bet he’s a bit smelly now” well no more smelly than usual…it’s getting close to that time again and in truth there’s a perfect opportunity to do it here as where I’m staying has a washing machine but it looks like mine and mine doesn’t dry well so I hang the clothes up in the airing cupboard.Or I could embrace the local custom and hang them across to the adjoining flats…anyway because of the wonders of modern technology I have sussed a place close to where I’m staying in Paris,and nothing says romance like watching your underwear do the spin dry hula in a Parisian laundromat…

Sat down for a smoke underneath a marble statue of someone or other.Wizened old bloke strikes up a conversation which I fail to understand of course.Explain I’m British with not much Italian speech “No no no no Italiano! Calabria! Calabria! No Italiano” he was getting quite animated in his insistence he was Calabriano not Italian(a long way from home too) sometimes it’s a minefield trying to keep up with all the different separatist movements…even though he got pretty heated he was still a nice old fella and we did that awkward shake hands/ fist bump thing on parting ways…

At the moment I’m looking around the Caruggi district of Genoa.For those unfamiliar Caruggi just means “Alleys” and that’s a wild understatement of where I am.Google rather unhelpfully calls it “Ghetto “ when posting a position update on Facebook and whilst it may look like your classic ghetto in parts, in reality it’s anything but…firstly if you charge €5 for a coffee in an artisan cafe you’re about as ghetto as Shoreditch,secondly some parts are full of top of the range independent clothes shop with prices that make you blow out your cheeks…however that being said the area has got everything going for it.Miles of tiny walkways littered with shops & cafes.Also leading off every main alley are lots of smaller alleys that either look inviting to investigate or absolutely terrifying depending on your nerves…it’s truely fascinating,terrifying,exciting,beautiful & ugly all in equal measure.I would recommend anyone who visits Genoa to spend a day walking around as it’s worth it but probably best to depart before the night descends as I believe it’s an area for some roughhousing and picking off of unwary tourists…the days are fine though…

Luckily it appears Caruggi has escaped the dreaded curse of gentrification.I don’t think even those snakes responsible for such heresy across the world would either dare,or get away with, trying to modernise such a wonderful area of the city…Infact it looks like many parts of Italian medieval cities have escaped this curse.I could be wrong but hope not…

Tomorrow is not only my last full day in Genoa but in Italy also and it’s been a blast.It’s an excellent country full of great food,beer & people and of course wonderful well preserved historical cities.If you’ve never been then give it a go.It’s very easy to see why it’s so popular.Even the bigger cities seem to have a certain calmness despite their size.I’ve enjoyed it immensely.Fits in perfectly with my state of mind,if you don’t take yourself too seriously,laugh easily and don’t mind the odd local gently taking the piss out of you I’m betting you’d love it too…like all countries,say hello,please,thank you,goodbye,don’t be a disrespectful arsehole and expect locals to fall all over you cos’ you have a bit of money to spend then you’ll be fine.It’s good to know some local language obviously but the basics will do and people always get by even if it takes a bit longer.So be cool and you’ll get on fine with the Italians.They’re ok…sorry went on a bit of a lecture there.Whooops…anyway I will no doubt return,hopefully soon…sadly there is one down side.No matter how cool you think you look,you ain’t ever out cooling an Italian…sorry.

If you’re a smoker by the way it’s pretty friendly that way.Not as many seem to smoke here as in Germany ( to be fair nowhere does,even France).But it’s still ok that way.Not found any bars that allow it but the weather is generally that good it doesn’t matter.You can smoke on train platforms like Germany and a pack of 20 is just over €6 which is half that of the UK and also I think France too.So I might stock up before Sunday…

Laters alligators…

60 Days in Europe…#28 Genoa…

After the slight kerfuffle with the hotel I popped out for a bevvy.I’m in an area of Genoa I know from last year so things were very familiar…first place they made me pay upfront,which is rare but it’s close to the station so maybe they’ve had runners(incidentally don’t do that,it’s a twat’s trick) there were a lot of Brits there too…took a stroll down to the docks where there’s some waterside bars,on the way are some sexy narrow side streets with artisan cafes & dodginess inter mingled…

I was only gonna have a quick(ish) pint but the bar had the arse end of the Ukraine v Belgium game on and I thought I’ve missed too much of the Euros already and Pedro Neto was starting for Portugal next game in what is bound to be an exciting free role to fully exploit his speed & skill.Can’t wait…ah well the football was shocking,apart from Georgia who were superb.Martinez decided he didn’t want to utilise Neto’s talents and played him as a shackled wing back with no space to use in front of him.Martinez clearly hails from the same Sunday school football thinking as Southgate…oh and Ronaldo is now a parody of his former greatness.A sort of Ken doll propping up the bar scrounging drinks for anecdotes…

Anyway good drink,enjoyed the football in a perverse way then decided to get the bus home…last bus,caught it before but had forgotten where I got off and for some reason thought the bus would double back and drop me outside the digs.It didn’t…ah well long walk home,luckily I sort of knew where I was and luckily it was downhill…

Been to Genoa Brignole station to try to sort out Sunday’s reservations to Paris but as I thought they couldn’t help as it’s only the French bit demanding them and it’s a different jurisdiction.This happened before at Nice(my change to Paris) it was mayhem and I ended up with a fine.I fully expect the same outcome.That’s life as the French say…

Saw the same number bus as last night so decided to catch it wondering where it went.Doing a bit of a tour and spotted a tiny bistro,fancied lunch and got off.It’s up in the hills above the city naturally,only the other side of town.The place has what The Guardian would describe as a certain rustic charm and of course the food was excellent…I so don’t want to descend into the Italian cliche of the Chef’s kiss followed by “ Bellissimo!” But then again I really do…

Genoa is huge.I wasn’t even aware how big until I latched onto that bus earlier.It goes in a circle so roams all over the shop and apart from width & depth there’s also the height too.A truely mega place and it looks nuts and cool too…if you’re ever here and want a good look around at cheapest prices get the 36 from outside Genova Brignole and you’ll not only get a unique sight seeing experience but also an insight into Italian bus driving techniques…

Laters alligators…

As I walked through the port side earlier some lads playing football and I got two touches(more than Kane the other night) one a deft control & flick with my right,the other a first time pass with my left.Been in Italy 13 days and I’m practically Andrea Pirlo so if you’re reading this WWFC I’m ready & waiting for the call…

60 Days in Europe…#27 Genoa…

Woke up this morning with itchy bitten legs & arms.Even though I have the mosquito spray it might be something that that doesn’t care about such pathetic human solutions.Also the nights have been humid and I’ve been sleeping on top of the bed rather than under the covers and also with a window open so not really helping myself there…luckily next door was a pharmacy so popped in and bought both anti histamine gel & tablets.The woman said the tablets were strong so it could be an interesting next ten days.The fact that you only get ten to a pack might vouch for their potency…all in all the two items were €23 so not cheap but hopefully it’s a price worth paying.Any trips in future I must remember to bring some cream.The European insects seem to like my blood…

Currently at La Spezia station waiting for the train.Luckily the coastal influencer trains all appear to be leaving from over the other side so hopefully mine won’t be too full,despite going the same direction I don’t think it stops in any of the desirable instagram hot spots…had a message from the hotel asking if it’s ok not to check in until 17-00.Fine by me as I stop at a station in Genoa I’m not familiar with and I will need time to work out where I’m actually going…

Journey fine.Chatted to a couple of French girls from Brittany on the platform,then a couple British girls from Northampton (they said South Midlands) on the train then when they got off a young French woman & baby sat by me and was rocking the nursery rhythms…the views are pretty spectacular but far too many tunnels to get decent train shots “ I’ll just line up this sho…damn another tunnel “ ah well.I can see why loads of people go along the coast though…

Got to Genoa Brignole and easily found the other station I needed.Grabbed a coffee and a salty old sea dog on the next table immediately recognised me as English because of how I drank it! Or it was a good guess.Anyway had a chat with him and now waiting outside the hotel for the boss man to turn up…

Ok I have learned a lot about myself on these solo trips and one thing is don’t be scared to put yourself out and ask if you’re in a spot.It’s a conceit of machismo to not ask for help if the situation arises.Invariably in a foreign country there will be language barriers but you get by…I was standing by what I thought was the hotel,I knew I was close but it wasn’t clearly defined.It was only 5 minutes past the time the fella said he’d be there but instinctively I knew I was in the wrong place so decided to walk into a local shop that was being done up,asked a workman if he knew the place by showing him the address on my phone.He spoke no English but held a finger up and dialed a call.Turns out he knew the bloke and it’s a sort of Airbnb(don’t know why I didn’t suss) and he came round and we got it sorted.He’s got no English either so we’ll get along just fine…seems ok.

The other good thing is I already have the Genoa transport app on my phone from last time and it kicked right in,didn’t even need to recall my password which obviously wouldn’t have happened.Actually on reflection that might not be a good thing after all.Anyway it made a change from the usual hoops you have to jump through…

It’s a lovely evening here in Genoa after a solid downpour earlier.Think I’ll take a stroll down the docks later…

Laters alligators…